The Top 100 Things I'd Do
If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord

Cheliax.

I'm glad that you got out.

Even though I've been murdering and enslaving people left, right, and center?

I'm not glad about what you've gotten up to since getting out, but I am glad that you got out.

You're ridiculous and I don't know why Pharasma calls you Good.

Her system has its bugs.

But I wasn't talking about the general category of people who kill the messenger. I was referring specifically to people who fly into rages and kill messengers just to illustrate how Evil they really are. 

What.

It's an important thing to demonstrate, sometimes, in Cheliax. 

Oh.

There are smarter ways to do it, though, which don't make people nervous about telling you things. 

I can imagine.

That puts you ahead of most people on Golarion.

What's number thirty-three?

33. I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. 

MY morale isn't!!!!

Is there no one thinking about MY morale???

Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.

Unlike a stainless-steel bustier, I am not entirely without flexibility. I don't make casters wear Gray Maiden armor, or, I don't do so unless forcing her to forfeit the use of her arcane or druid powers and fight in melee with a sword and shield was the artistic vision behind inducting her in the first place, which so far is only true of one wizard - I'm still looking for my druid. 

And the higher-ranking the officer, or the more they bring to the table, the more willing I am to negotiate when it comes to outfits. It's not aesthetically important for high-ranking officers to look nearly identical with all the other Maidens, unless that's the whole artistic vision behind why I etcetera. I don't make Togomor shapeshift and wear the plate. 

But.

I do make Togomor dress with red accents! The high-ranking members of my organization are the ones I spend the most time around! They need to look good as a group! 

What would my outfit look like, as your evil lieutenant?

You're proficient in heavy armor from your fighter dip, and don't lose any important class features from wearing medium armor, right? 

If we're just talking combat mechanics, I'd rather keep my full movespeed, but at least I wouldn't lose any magic.

I'm imagining a mithral suit of armor that's inspired by Minkaian o-yoroi but also by Gray Maiden plate - under the armor I'd dress you in red, but I wouldn't wrap the armor itself in anything too chromatic, I'd let the mithral show, except where we need red thread to lace lamellar plates, and maybe a red leather wrap for the upper half of the waidate... no, I think we leave the waidate unwrapped. The armor'd have long skirts like o-yoroi, and all of the plates, even the little lamellar scales, would be etched with intricate designs - I'm thinking animals and vegetation, especially flowers and especially the kind of flower you grow in your hair - which can only be appreciated from up close, but from further away they give a kind of texture that helps set you apart from the rank and file without being too obviously different in kind. You'd wear the red cloak and cape, and a tasteful number of rubies, nowhere where they're stealing the spotlight, just as tasteful accents, but you'd also have some green and earth-tone design elements as a nod to your old color scheme - but I'd want to rewrap your katana, swap out its sheath, and repaint the naginata - there's nodding at an old color scheme, and then there's keeping it. You wouldn't have the red plume on your helmet, though, I'd want you wearing some cool Tian-looking kawari kabuto, maybe with leafy antlers like that one pokemon you showed me, Sawsbuck. Maybe those should be made out of wood, and we could incorporate other pieces of wood in the armor? Or, nah, let's just do it all in mithral. Shiny mithril-silver antlers, mithril leaves, mithril flowers. Maybe designs on the antlers, like scrimshaw? Oh! And some of the etchings on the antlers and armor could be various grass-type pokemon! No one on Golarion would get it but the two of us; to everyone else they're just weird monsters. Most of the etchings should be real plants though, people looking closely at it should think vegetation and strange beasts, not strange beasts and vegetation. The face plate would look like it came from a set of gray maiden armor, but there'd be etchings in it to give that texture.

Under the helmet, things get tricky because of your fast healing. I think I'd go crazy with piercings, maybe with some chains to connect them. Or maybe just one chain, from your nose to your ear, for that asymmetric look? Oh, and I could drill holes in your skull for swappable studs, or just screw in neat-looking things! A ruby or an emerald between your eyebrows? No, let's stick rubies in over your eyebrows, near your temples.

I love having fast healing.

It's giving me so many ideas. I think I'm going try start trying some of them on new initiates - and then after I've done everything that needs cure light wounds, I can do everything that cure light wounds would wreck and leave that to heal naturally. 

Aww, but I thought the skull-drilling was going to be a special thing just for me. If you're doing it to everyone, does it really mean anything?

You're just saying that because you don't want me to trepenate anyone who isn't into it.