a supervillain kidnaps a girl to fatten her up
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Excited squeeing.

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"No promises, starburst."

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"I will do my best to become as soft and cuddly as possible in order to incentivize you."

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"You will be like a soup dumpling."

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"...I'm not a biologist but I'm pretty sure fat is not a liquid???"

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"You get very oozy when I've got you in my clutches, though."

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"Fair point. 'Soup dumpling' just brings to mind me exploding and liquid squirting out of my insides though."

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"Well, that could probably also be arranged, though it's not to my usual taste." Bite bite.

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"I would prefer to remain intact."

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"Maybe one day I will need that information." Bite bite bite.

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"So like, do you have any hobbies, besides ravishing me?"

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"Oh, I'm a bit of a workaholic, but I do like to be well-read."

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"Any favorites?" She's dreading having to share hers and inevitably be judged for it but she's already locked into this line of conversation.

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"I like books more as - points on a graph showing all the thoughts people are having. Somebody, somewhere, sometime, thought it would be a laugh to write thus and such a book. It might be more or less fun to look into it but it's not the kind of thing I have favorites about."

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"You are one fascinating human being." The detached attitude is a little concerning compatibility-wise but it sure is a unique perspective.

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"However, my standard answer for when I don't want to have an extended conversation about it is 'War and Peace'."

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"Because you actually like it, or because it gets people to stop asking questions?"

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"I like it enough that if I roll the dice and get somebody who actually wants to talk about War and Peace I don't have to shank him to make them stop."

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