"We could, uh, swap? Because I could use some practice. --Platonically."

"Oh, yeah, we should definitely-- but wait I got distracted. Magic is real! I don't think I succeeded at processing that."

"I can put you second in the queue for trying to get magic once I work out how to give it to other people?"

"You're the only person in the world with magic?!"

"At the moment."

"HOW?!"

(Wei Wuxian normally does not yell this much but he has had a Day.)

He did find out about magic via someone accidentally shapeshifting in front of him. "I don't know, I just got offered an oath to spread joy and I... Took it? And got magic?"

"I can spread joy great. I'm a very joyful person."

"You'd probably be better at this than me."

"Yeah!!! Everyone I talk to loves me and I fill their life with joy," Wei Wuxian says, incorrectly. "So what can you do that's magic?"

"I'm learning a magic language, and I can--" Someone with a not below average SED could make 'sticking as much of your arm down your throat as possible' sexy instead of kind of awkward looking.

"Whoa! I could literally fuck your-- wait! Magic language?"

He very much could! Platonically, even.

He extracts his arm so he can talk. "I'm still at the 'learning how to say thank you' stage." He demonstrates by saying 'thank you' in the speech.

"Coooool. Are there any nonhumans that speak it?"

"Apparently all of them?"

"...flies can talk?"

"...probably? I don't know enough to really check yet."

"This is really important! If you can talk to flies then flies are people and then, uh, we have a big problem that your sex-themed magic powers do not at ALL seem equipped to deal with because BEING A FLY IS VERY BAD."

"I'm not sure how you would spread joy to a fly?"

"KEEP IT FROM HAVING A HORRIBLE MISERABLE DEATH." He runs into the bathroom.

"Do-- do you have flies in the bathroom?"

He comes out gently cupping a cockroach in his hands. "There, there, Daddy's got you," he says to it soothingly. "Tell it that I'm very sorry about bothering it but this is important."

"I only know how to say thank you and some emotion words? I just started learning yesterday."

<<Thank you, sorry, [anxiety about something of grave importance.]>> (It's not grammatical, but he hasn't learned the grammar yet.)

The cockroach looks up at him. <<I'm a>> and then a word he doesn't know.

"It said something? It said it was something, but I don't know what."