I can't do the job interview thing of telling you how if at all this has come up before, since that's not really a necessary breach. I can encourage patients to tell people things but it's correct that I can't go against their wishes if I can't convince them.

Lancir nods. Doesn't seem surprised. 

"Is there any way to carve out an exception if you do it up front?" he says quietly. "Before agreeing to see someone, make it clear that– hmm, I wouldn't actually want it to be as broad as 'anything that affects their work', that...sort of negates the whole thing where they might be more comfortable being open with you, who isn't an authority figure over them. I've been thinking on it and, I agree, it could be an issue. Still, I'd feel more comfortable if there were some set of circumstances where you'd warn me if it was ill-advised to send someone on a difficult assignment that week. Figure I'd run it by you in principle before thinking about specifics." 

Uh... I could imagine coming to some sort of agreement on that with a patient but I don't have the shape of it already in mind.

I guess you could do something where there's a randomization device which I use secretly, like I roll a die, and if it's a six, or I think someone shouldn't go on an assignment, then I tell you that either it was a six or they shouldn't go on an assignment. I'd still want the patients to agree to this and wouldn't use the system if they didn't.

"Huh!" He looks startled, sits back. "I...could agree to that. Er, how often would you be rolling the die for that? If the ratio actually was one dice-roll per five times it was really your opinion, I don't think that would cause issues with our deployments, but if it made the effective number of times I need to pull people off assignments double, that could present more issue." Grimace. "We...have a shortage of Heralds. Of everything, really." 

It could be a die with a lot of sides. I could roll it when you're considering any patient of mine going on an assignment, or there could be an extra layer of randomization where I roll the die whenever I have an appointment that worries me or I flip a coin and it comes up heads after an unworrying appointment, or something.

Lancir laughs. "...I stopped following you somewhere around 'extra layer of randomization', but as a general system I'd be on board. Er, given that, I'm not going to ask you if you think it's a reasonable idea to send Vanyel on an assignment to the northwest border. Elspeth just asked. I told her no on habit. Just to warn you, she's going to ask about once a fortnight." 

Vanyel hasn't agreed to this dice or no dice.

"...Can you ask him?" 

I... don't feel confident that people wouldn't read into his response.

"Read what into his response?" Lancir says blankly. He sighs, rubs his forehead. "I, just – every time I choose not to send him somewhere because I'm worried, people die. There's a cost here. And it scares me having to make that judgement call with no information at all." 

I mean, yeah. This is a hard problem.

I think it's the same with mental health, that I'm asking of people that they give up something incredibly precious that they may be relying on to cope with their problems, that they expose themselves to all that embarrassment and that they do all that work to put their feelings into communicable form and that they deal, for the rest of their lives, with me knowing their deepest secrets. Because I think I can help with their problems more than I'll hurt just by being there, and that I will not make anything any worse than it absolutely has to be to let me do that. And maybe this is all wrong for Heralds because you have Companions all nestled into your heads whether you ask for them or not, or something, but I'd need to hear that from the Heralds who are my patients, not the Heralds who are asking me to hurt those patients just a little more.

Lancir listens and nods and occasionally looks like he really wants to say something, and when he's done he starts to open his mouth and then doesn't, and instead looks past her shoulder. 

(He's busy considering a number of things he could say and deciding not to because, by now, he's caught on that they definitely won't lead to the sort of productive conversation he wants and will, instead, lead to being shouted at or, maybe worse, silently judged.

He could say that the Companions are a backchannel source of information anyway – except that, one, Yfandes is weirdly cagey on the matter of Vanyel, and two, Yfandes doesn't necessarily have perfect or unbiased judgement on the matter, so it's not something to be counted on. Also he doesn't actually want to get Bella mad at Yfandes for the times she has answered Taver's queries about her Chosen. He could say that what he actually wants is to be able to sit down with Vanyel and have a normal conversation, between two adults, about whether he's up for a mission right now, and he would much prefer this to the pulling-teeth privacy-invading conversations they have in practice, and if she could help Vanyel solve this problem then he would be eternally grateful. He's also pretty sure that Bella won't respond well to that. Or to pretty much anything he could possibly say about Vanyel, because by definition it's coming from him, the Herald in a position of authority, and not her patient.) 

"That's an interesting perspective," he says finally. "I do see your point, I think – I'm just not sure how to balance it against my duties to the Kingdom." He smiles slightly. "You've simplified that for yourself, I guess. You don't have any responsibility to a kingdom. And I see how that does make you better placed to do what you do, when you don't have competing pressures. So...all right. If I need to judge whether to send Vanyel on a mission, I'll talk to him myself – er, without using my Sight or anything, unless I ask and he agrees. If you don't feel comfortable asking him about the randomization thing after the fact, I won't press. I'll consider passing on other Heralds to you, but only if they do agree to the randomization policy you come up with. Thoughts?" 

To be clear, I can't stop you from asking Vanyel about the randomization policy, or for that matter anything else you want to talk to him about. And certainly nobody has to decide to see me even if this is because of how they're instructed from on high. I'm describing how my behavior is constrained here, not Vanyel's or yours or anyone else's.

Now Lancir just looks sort of baffled again. "I'll...keep that in mind." 

I mean, I have lots of preferences but I can't exactly go "I have this principle, now conform to it". But if I think people are acting badly toward Vanyel that can affect the advice I give.

"Advice you give me, or him?" (Lancir suspects this is going to get him yelled at or silently judged but he's genuinely confused.) 

Well, both, but you're less likely to specifically seek me out for advice, probably?

"Fair enough." Lancir sits back in his chair. "Sort-of-unrelatedly, I'm actually very curious to see what you ended up doing with him after I left. With my Mindhealing Sight, I mean, for learning purposes, I'd like to better understand how your subtle arts work looks to our Gifts. However, I would understand if he didn't want that, and I would understand if you thought he wouldn't feel comfortable saying no if you asked. So I guess it's up to you if you want to ask." 

He fidgets with a report on his desk. "It also occurs to me that there's now another Mindhealer locally, and," he's visibly reluctant but forges on, "honestly I think Melody's better with her Gift than I am – she's been practicing it full-time, not cramming it into the cracks between acting as Queen's Own. So for the purpose of studying how Mindhealing interacts with your arts, rather than just assuaging my curiosity, she'd do as well or better. Er, if you want to ask him. I'm not going to pressure you to, just mentioning it." 

Noted.

"Er, did you have anything else you wanted to say to me, while we're here?" 

I don't really have an agenda here. I guess you might be a good person to ask about how likely I am to wind up conscripted for any of my useful abilities at some point.

"I don't know." He shrugs. "If there's a war – and I put, oh, four in ten odds of that happening when Elspeth dies, she's holding a lot together in terms of our alliances – then I do think we would make some strong requests. Desperate, even. I...don't think we can exactly force you to do anything you don't want to. Given your magic and all. If you were going to be Chosen it would've happened by now, I think." 

It had better not.

Lancir seems a bit taken aback, but lets it slide. "I think that's everything, then. If you do need help with anything, resources wise, that you can't get at Healers', do feel free to pass that on to me." 

He goes silent for a moment, then ducks his head. "I...just wanted to say, that I'm incredibly grateful to you for helping Vanyel. Really and truly. I know pretty much all we've done is argue about it, and that we disagree on a lot of things, but... I care about him and I want him to be well and happy." An embarrassed little shrug. "That's all I wanted to say." 

I'm glad we can agree there.