"It's fine," he sighs. "Just follow the fucking rabbit."

"...I suppose it's not really likely anyone's going to come down the elevator right now."

The lady emerges from the employees-only door with a mop and a bucket.

"Oh, let me-" He takes the wipes out of his backpack again and starts cleaning the window. "Sorry about that, I didn't even realize."

"Didn't realize that having sex in front of the window would mess it up?"

(The girl who was recording it all and the couple have long since left.)

He sniffles. "-that you'd have to clean it up. I- I have these wipes- I usually-"

He bursts into tears.

"—hey, no, don't—why are you crying, sweetie, that's not—"

"I- I fucked up Eric's life because I thought I had a better handle on this than I really did, and, and, he told me this was going to happen and I didn't listen, and I was going to make you clean up my cum off the glass because I was too stupid to take out my wipes and do something useful instead of just crying," he sobs. "And, and Sally isn't here and she does like 80% of my emotional regulation so I'm not like this all the time! And I can't even call her because then I'd have to explain all of this!"

"...well, I suppose you can wipe it if it will make you feel better but I'll need to clean it anyway..."

He picks up his backpack and runs to the bathroom and locks himself in a stall, where he cries some more.

No one comes bother him.

Eventually he's done crying. He feels kind of numb, in that way you get after you've been crying for a while. He unlatches the door and washes his face in the sink, then dries off with a paper towel.

He wonders if Eric's done yet. Probably not.

He wishes there was some way to just... be done with waiting. Like Skip to the Good Parts, except it's not going to be good it's going to be terrible okay don't start crying again it's okay. Like... the opposite of Slack. 

Wait, Slack exists. Maybe there is a way.

A skill has been created by a special action! Skipping over 19 minutes of waiting while nothing interesting happened from your own character perspective has created the skill Timeskip.

Well, that answers that.

Some part of him is still able to find this really cool, even through the crying-related numbness and the Eric-related dread.

Speaking of which: he's going to have to leave the bathroom now. He takes a deep breath and opens the door.

Eric is finishing putting his clothes back on and there's a cardboard box lying next to him in front of the desk. Other receptionist is dutifully ignoring him, and the cleaning lady has left. Eric's boss is nowhere to be seen.

He looks at Ari. "Oh. You're still here." He looks like he's been crying, too.

"Yeah," Ari says shakily. "I didn't want to, um. Leave you alone. Did he..."

"Yep, I am fired, and I have one week to find somewhere else to live because, guess what, living here was a job perk. Good work on your magic, by the way."

"You can live with me. Sally likes you and, and we've got a spare room- we've got like three actually- she's been saying the apartment is too empty-"

"Mr. Kaltmann, my first instinct was to say that this would be terribly unprofessional but this no longer applies. My second instinct would be that I don't want to see you again ever in my life, but that would be a rotten lie. My third instinct is to punch you, but fortunately this becomes much easier if I live with you. So sure, why the fuck not."

Quest completed: The Reluctant Slutty Porter

Eric has lost his job, but he got you. That's a good tradeoff, right?

+5,000xp, Eric Jones added to your harem

Your level has increased by 1!

Ari lets out a shaky breath of relief. "If you want to punch me you can, I'm into it."

Before Eric can do so, Ari wraps him in a tight hug.

Yeah fine sure hug. "Can you help me move my stuff up, then?"

"Yes, absolutely. Just lead the way."

He finishes putting his shoes on and does.

Ari follows.

There is packing, and the bringing of Stuff upstairs. Sally's apartment does indeed have three spare bedrooms in addition to Ari and Sally's. It also has a balcony, and several paintings which might belong in various museums, and a very large bathroom with an honest-to-God hot tub in it.

Ari pauses as they cross the threshold. "I should probably let her know about this arrangement, huh."

Yeah don't mind him he's too speechless by the sight.

Ari sets down the bags he's carrying, and takes out his phone, and takes a moment to kiss the speechless Eric. Then he speed-dials Sally.

"Hey Sally! How's LA? ...yeah, I bet. Listen, um, you're going to want to talk to me about a lot of stuff when you get back, but- ha ha ha. No, just... you're going to want to hear this in person. But, um, summary of the relevant parts, Eric - yeah, Eric Jones. He lost his job and it was kind of my fault and I invited him to stay with- kind of. Yes. Okay, yes, entirely. Anyway, is Eric allowed to stay with us."

There is an audible-to-Eric "YES" from the other side of the phone, followed by some additional shouting, which Ari cuts off with an "Okay! Thank you I love you very much goodbye."

He hangs up. "Sally says you can stay, and also that she is going to make my skin into a tasteful lampshade."