It’s not like he’s not used to being stared at. He had only been “a little more hardcore than usual” for a little while, after he first ran away — it’s like going home, going back to being a freak.

But this is just sad.

When the bell rings, he makes his way across the room and grabs a chair from someone else’s desk, setting it in front of the guy who’s been watching him all afternoon and sitting down on it backwards, arms folded across the backrest.

“So.”

Aaaaaaa the villain kid is talking to him what should he do what should he do

"hi?"

“Yeah, hi, guy who’s been staring at me for an hour.”

He extends an arm and prods the middle of Kaleva’s chest with a finger.

When the villain kid touches him, Kaleva feels a sort of hot tingly shiver spread through his entire body. It is nice except for the part where it is terrifying.

About thirty seconds later, he realizes that the villain kid was probably waiting for an answer. "I wasn't," he mumbles unconvincingly.

“Every time I looked at you you were making this face at me.”

"Uh. Sorry?" he continues to mumble.

Kaleva braces himself for the part where he gets thrown into a locker.

...hmm.

He catches Kaleva’s chin in his hand and tips it up towards him.

Kaleva has completely short-circuited.

He stares at the villain kid's mouth, biting his lip, with an expression of utter yearning. 

...well, that’s fun.

Might as well give him what he wants, right? Good start on his mission, anyway.

He leans forward and kisses him.

(Kisses apparently involve a lot more of your tongue than Kaleva might have expected.)

While "kisses have lots of tongue" is on the list of things Kaleva didn't expect, it is actually pretty low down the list! Topping the list are "men sometimes kiss other men," "people kiss in empty chemistry classrooms," "people kiss people they just met when there hasn't been a song establishing that they're in love with each other," and "anyone at all would want to kiss Kaleva."

Kaleva has no idea what he is doing. But he kisses hungrily and passionately and as if he simultaneously expects that you are going to stop kissing him at any second so he should make the most of it, and that if he shoves his face into yours hard enough then you will be able to kiss forever.

Wow. This guy’s deprived.

And...it’s not bad, honestly. He could get used to this.

He kisses him for a minute, then pulls back and stands up, not bothering to replace his chair.

Kaleva stares out dopily into space, touching his mouth.

...that’s kind of cute.

And really weird to see. How do you survive like that?

He waves over his shoulder as he heads for the door.

“You’d better find me at dinner.”

And then he’s gone.

Eventually all of Kaleva's brain cells come back online and he thunks his head into the desk.

In principle, Kaleva could have guessed that it was possible for men to kiss men. After all, mouths are not a sexually dimorphic trait. But it was just unthinkable. Men didn't marry men. Men didn't rescue men from dragons, or go on quests to earn the heart of a man, or awaken a man from a hundred years' sleep with true love's kiss. So how could men possibly kiss each other?

Except. The villain kid had definitely kissed him.

Since it is something that villains did, and something that Kaleva had never heard of in all his years in Auradon, it is probably evil. 

And he had liked it. He kind of wants it to happen again.

"Oh no," he moans.

He checks the time. He's like fifteen minutes late to his next class. In theory he should run but he can't bring himself to move any faster than a slow, dreamy walk.

He doesn't get anything out of the rest of the classes for that day, and when he tries to do homework he finds himself drawing doodles in the margin. He can't stop thinking about it-- he was kissed, he was kissed by a guy, he liked it, someone wanted to kiss him. No matter what he tries to think about, his thoughts are drawn inexorably back to the feeling of the villain kid's lips on his own.

He doesn't even know the villain kid's name.

At dinner, Kaleva is barely hungry. He gets an apple and some of the roast beef, for form's sake, and then sits at his accustomed empty table with his accustomed book. His skin is buzzing and he's on edge; it feels like he's almost at the top of a rollercoaster, that same sort of half-anticipation half-anxiety. He would prefer not to admit to himself how much he hopes that the villain kid will find him.

There’s a quiet thunk that turns out to be a practically overflowing plate of food, and the villain kid slides into the empty chair next to him.

“I’m hurt. Emotionally wounded.”

"Sorry?" Kaleva tries.

Someone is sitting next to him. This has happened before exactly twice in his career at Auradon Prep and one time it ended in him being tossed into a garbage can. 

“...that was a joke,” he clarifies, eyeing Kaleva’s apple.

He didn't want that apple that much anyway!

The villain kid can have it and maybe that will get him to kiss Kaleva again stop him from throwing Kaleva into the garbage.

He makes a face, for a minute, staring at the apple like it’s just turned blue and started to levitate.

Then he tucks it away into his bag. Kaleva can catch a glimpse of a few more apples, and some cookies wrapped in a napkin.

“What’s your name, anyway?”

"Uh. Kaleva? Kaleva Weaselton?" He pronounces it 'Wesselton.'

“Z,” he says.

And then: “What’s your deal, anyway?”

"I don't. Have a deal?"