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[Splits off from 'life swarms with innocent monsters' here.]
"Looking at the stars?"
cayden cailean gets laid
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the-pale-elf
Cayden isn't even the warmest person he's taken to bed-- there was that fire genasi that one time-- or the snuggles, but he can luxuriate in it a little more. He's not going to have to lead him into the jaws of Cazador.
"You're lucky I'm such a generous person."
the-lucky-drunk
"I give thanks every day for your altruism and selflessness. Honestly baffling you aren't a cleric of Sarenrae yet."
the-pale-elf
"Why do we have Shadowheart when we have me. I'm so much better at making people feel better."
the-pale-elf
It's great when people are easy to please.
Does Cayden feel this positively about his butt being groped?
the-lucky-drunk
He feels very pleased about this!
Most of him feels pleased about this. His dick seems apathetic.
the-pale-elf
Okay, it's probably just that his body is not all quick on the uptake today. This is a fixable problem that he can work with. He's not on a time limit.
He's just going to keep kissing him and playing with his butt and thighs and something will happen.
the-lucky-drunk
It doesn't seem to be fixing itself! Even though Cayden is making very pleased noises and exploring which parts of Astarion's body are erogenous zones. (Shoulders? Nipples? Elbows?)
the-pale-elf
On the one hand: it's not like he has to take him back to Cazador. It doesn't matter if Cayden is disinterested.
On the other, and also all the of the tentacles that are going to be bursting out of their faces if they don't fix this: any plan that requires defeating Cazador-- Hells, any plan that requires not being thrown back to him with a gift wrapped bow around his throat-- requires Cayden to like him and consider him useful. And giving Cayden a good time is the best way to do that and it's not working.
Okay. Barely concealed panic will not help the situation. Suave unruffled calm might.
He whispers into Cayden's ear, "Did you have any plans for tonight?"
the-pale-elf
"Glad to hear it." Oh come on. If Cayden wants to play guessing games he can, but come on.
the-lucky-drunk
"Sorry my dick's not cooperating but I can still suck you or give you a handjob if you want."
the-pale-elf
What is the answer you want, Cayden? "You've been far too nice to me already."
the-lucky-drunk
"I have been exactly as nice to you as you deserve."
In the absence of Astarion evincing a preference Cayden will return to Erogenous Zone Investigation. What about Astarion's belly?
the-lucky-drunk
Investigation unsuccessful!
"Look," he says, "I know I don't look it, but I'm actually pretty old? And when you're as old as me your dick doesn't always work right. But that's no reason we can't have a good time."
the-lucky-drunk
"If you needed a hard dick to be satisfied women who fuck women would be having a time."
the-pale-elf
"...we're stuck in a self sacrifice loop, aren't we? We're just going in circles going 'oh no, you take the last piece of cake.'"
the-lucky-drunk
"No, I'm not sacrificing anything. I actually and genuinely enjoy kissing and touching you even when I can't get it up, and I also actually and genuinely enjoy sucking you off in the same situation."