"Mmm, I could be."

"Well, I am an innocent, and I have no idea what else you could be doing this far away from camp."

"Innocents like you should be more careful. Who knows what's lurking out here in the woods."

"I am utterly defenseless and at the mercy of any monsters who happen to stop by."

"You are." Is this blushing innocent going to let him into his personal space?

This blushing innocent has no idea what could go wrong with letting Astarion into his personal space!

Hmm, can the innocent be gently pushed over?

Oh no the innocent has been overpowered.

So very overpowered! He has no way to avoid being... kissed.

Whatever shall he do about this dread fate!

(Kiss back, probably.)

Excellent choice for the blushing innocent! (He's glad he's already worked out how Cayden likes to be kissed. It's so much more efficient.)

It's very good, you see, because he wants Astarion to have a good time, and he also wants to be kissed so hard that he can't think so it drives everything that went wrong today out of his mind, and it turns out that these are the same thing.

It's always fun to be with someone... malleable. Someone you can kiss bruises into and then they'll keep leaning into it.

Yes that's very good. Astarion should keep doing that. 

...does he want bruises kissed into him?

Mmm, if Cayden wants to do that. 

"My mother warned me about strange men."

"Oh? And what did she say?"

"Be careful, or they'll do just awful things to your virtue."

"We just take and take and take, and you couldn't do anything to stop us because you're alone in woods."

"But I'm sure you're very safe and trustworthy and I have nothing to lose from kissing you." 

He kisses Astarion.

Kiss!

Hungry kiss.

He did not expect Cayden to be this type, but it makes a certain sense. He's strong enough to think he can't be forced.

Astarion is a good kisser. He runs his hands along Astarion's back and gropes his ass a little bit.

Does Cayden want to pinned?

Yes, please!

"Now I'm entirely at your mercy."

Astarion grins down at him. "You are, aren't you?"

He is going to use his newfound powers for neck kisses.

Squirm squirm squirm.

Yes, Cayden should be pinned and squirming under him. This is the best idea he's ever had in his life. 

Hopefully Cayden will stay pinned with just one hand, so he can snake the other up his shirt.

"You really are a blushing innocent, aren't you?"

"Mhm. I have absolutely no idea what you're going to do next."

"I could do anything, and you'd think this was how it goes." Cayden, for the love of Sharess, please have a preference he can work with. 

What? He's doing great at preferences! Goofy roleplay, neck kisses, and Astarion's ass! 

He's going to play with Astarion's hair about these accusations.

Okay, that's fair.

He is going to have to take revenge, though. Revenge by taking off Cayden's shirt.

He catches Astarion's hand. "Let's not, last time I got naked in a situation like this the camp got attacked by gnolls and I had to fight off six of them fully naked."

...right, they are in the woods. "Gods, I hate it when I have to be reasonable."

At least there's a good excuse for Cayden not to see his back.

Cayden is going to return to fully clothed kissing and groping. 

Cayden will simply also have to be groped when clothes on. What a shame they'll have to wait till they have a door to get clothes off. 

This leg is definitely against Cayden's crotch to pin him. Ahuh.

All the grinding happening here is purely coincidental.

So, so coincidental. "You act like a blushing maiden--" neck kiss "-- but I think you actually want this."

"It is," Cayden says agreeably, "certainly the most intense pleasure I have experienced in my short and virginal life."

Toothy smile. "And you're not worried this will make it shorter?"

"What harm could there be in something this delightful?" He punctuates his point by kissing Astarion's neck and lightly biting his ear.

He'd say the ear biting is inspired, but a good half of the humans he's slept with have tried that one,  but he can't complain.

He grinds against him, teasingly slow. "Didn't anyone warn you about the people you meet in the woods? I could be dangerous."

Cayden answers by kissing him very thoroughly. He's steadily grinding against Astarion's thigh. Not quite moaning yet, but his breath is a bit heavy.

The nice thing about not having to breathe is you can more in control than you actually are. "You're too cute to hurt, aren't you?"

"Not that cute."

"Mmm, you're panting and squirming under me. I think I can safely call that cute." Kiss on the nose for emphasis.

Cayden flips him and pins him.

Okay, this is happening! Cayden is definitely strong enough to do that to him. He maybe should have predicted this. 

"You thought you were the dangerous one but you see it is I who is dangerous! And I shall attack you! With kisses!"

He's laughing and scattering kisses across Astarion's cheeks.

He is trying to hold onto his dignity here but it's hard not to crack up while Cayden is doing that. 

"The most ferocious attacks!" 

Apparently the most ferocious attacks are palming Astarion's dick while kissing him on the eyebrows.

Oh no, there's nothing he can do to stop him~~

Though at least now Cayden's butt is in groping range. It's a good butt.

The next attack is to take off Astarion's pants. Fiercely. With growling involved.

"You were the one who was worried about gnolls." The griping isn't serious.

"I'm not taking them all the way off. You can pull up your pants more quickly than you can put on your shirt. "

"Gods, I hate it when you're reasonable." He shifts his hips so Cayden can more easily do minimal pants removal.

Cayden gets both Astarion's pants and his own pants around their ankles, and then pins Astarion again and starts to kiss him, with attention to anything that Astarion seems to particularly like.

Astarion seems to like kissing Cayden's neck and jaw. He should let Astarion do that all the time, thank you. 

What a mutually agreeable state of affairs!

He grinds against Astarion's dick.

He likes it when someone has easy to fulfill preferences. He can't just lie there, but it's a near enough thing.

Cayden is getting more focused. His eyes are half-lidded. He holds Astarion close, one hand playing with his hair, the other hand running up and down his side and the outside of his thigh; it's a soft, affectionate kind of thing, like he thinks that Astarion is precious. He moans.

He can do precious and cuddly and holding Cayden close, that's easy--

He doesn't have to think that hard to say he's wonderful, and keep doing that--

Cayden might have noticed something's up but he's really quite distracted.

Astarion is so soft and so warm and so very pretty.

Good. He's trying to be distracting.

Cayden has a very kissable neck. 

His hand brushes against Astarion's scars and he stills.

Cayden should not be paying attention to that. Look he has a face! That's much more interesting than his back.

Cayden very deliberately moves away from the scars and compliments Astarion's pretty, pretty face.

Astarion smiles. "Flatterer."

"Mhmmmmm." Words are hard. What if Astarion has forehead kisses about it instead.

Forehead kisses are very acceptable.

He whimpers and holds Astarion close enough that it hurts a little bit. His hips are going faster.

Cayden is incredibly huggy, but he can't bring himself to complain when he's making faces like that.

He's achieving his goal of making the party leader like him, and that's what matters.

Cayden stops, shifts so he's fucking between Astarion's thighs, starts to fuck hard and fast, makes a very quiet noise, and comes.

Astarion ruffles his hair. "Adorable."

"Didn't want to come all over your shirt. --Want me to suck you off?"

He knows the type. They want to think of themselves as good and giving lovers, and it's strictly better than the alternative, but it's still an act. "You're very generous."

"I don't have a gag reflex so you can fuck my throat if you want. Or not, if you want me to lie back and do all the work. Whatever you like."

He gets between Astarion's legs, takes Astarion into his mouth, and puts Astarion's hands on his head.

It feels-- strange, to have Cayden's skull under his fingers. He doesn't remember the last time he had control like this, instead of something play-acted.

And here Cayden is, putting his generosity where his mouth is. (Or would it be the other way around?)

Lying about not having a gag reflex would be stupid, but unfortunately that's the natural state of horny young humans. 

It would be just as stupid not to put that claim to the test, of course. 

It is true, he doesn't have a gag reflex.

He clearly just came and is sleepy and done with sex, and also clearly doesn't seem to think this matters with regards to whether Astarion is fucking his face.

Astarion is having an emotion about Cayden just letting him use his face. He feels... powerful. Yes, that's it. Cayden is, very literally, in the palm of his hands.

Is this how Cazador feels all the time? If so, no wonder he behaves so abominably.

"Gods, now I have to choose between coming down your throat or marking your pretty little face."

Cayden's mouth is full but he makes a very agreeable noise.

Cayden has to be faking. It's the only logical explanation.

So, coming on Cayden's face sounds fun in theory, but it's going to involve taking his cock out of this nice warm mouth, which is more effort than its worth. (Cayden feels like a furnace.)

He pulls Cayden as far down into his cock as he can as he comes.

Cayden swallows and then kisses Astarion. "That was fun."

That was fun! That seems improbable.

Kiss back. "I could be persuaded to keep you around." 

"At the very least you should ravish me somewhere with fewer rocks."

"A nice in with a bed where we have the time do things properly." It's a pity: the rocks and implicit time limit were a fun change of pace.

"I could suck you off for half an hour, if you like."

He laughs. "I'm surprised that's where your mind goes first."

"Why? You have a very nice cock."

"The way you flatter me, it almost makes me think you want to get in my pants again. I just thought you'd be interested in other parts of me."

"I'm also not against receiving a blowjob!"

He laughs. "It's all mouths and cocks with you, isn't it?" Honestly, he doesn't mind. It's just amusingly specific.

"I also like hands! And grinding! I like grinding the best, honestly."

"Now come, you've already got me in your clutches. You don't have to lie."

"I mean-- I know it doesn't have to be like that, I had a boyfriend who was really into fucking. But with hands and grinding it's kind of like you're both equals, right? And even with mouth stuff, technically one person is being penetrated but they're also doing all the work. But when you're getting fucked in the ass there's always a top and a bottom and it feels like-- there's the one that's in charge and the one that isn't. And I don't like it."

This man is fake. He cannot be real. This has to be some very elaborate act to try and bait him for some specific reason. 

Everything is about power. That's the way of the world.

He ruffles his hair. "You're too cute for your own good, you know that?"

"Thais got me to like things in my butt ages ago so I can be convinced."

"Should I be jealous of this Thais?"

"She's the mom of my kids. --Or, I have a lot of kids, but she's the mom of my kids that I had on purpose instead of as the natural consequence of coming inside a woman."

He sounds very affectionate.

He's married? Of course he's married, he had to have some flaw or another and at least this one could be worse. "You must miss them terribly.

"Not really, I normally go three or six months between seeing them. Thais says I'm a terrible influence."

... of course. "The adventuring life will do that."

He reminisces: "We adventured together for a while. Worked together to overthrow this Reaper of Reputation cult. She used her network from her johns to get information and did a bit of poison, I did the intimidating and the fighting and got any information I could get from getting drunk... it was good times. But when we finally destroyed the leader she wanted to retire, run her own brothel, raise her kids. I stop by now and then. The girl's good with her sword, I think she'll take after her dad."

"She's going to grow up to be a terror."

"Well, her mom hasn't given up on her having a nice safe job in the family business."

"I can't imagine knowing a bit of sword play wouldn't hurt."

"Keep the johns on their toes."

"Keep them on their toes, I'm sure there's someone out there that likes people holding blades to their neck--" Meaningful look at Cayden.

He laughs. "Not me! I'm boring in that way. I like two or more people having a good time."

"Mmm, I'm definitely sitting here very bored."

He kisses Astarion's temple. "Calistria's hairy cunt, people are weird about anal."

"It is a strange thing to decide to do, you have to agree on that."

"And half the tops don't realize it's not supposed to hurt."

????? "I think you have to give them some credit, they're fighting biological reality on that one."

"I mean, not really? If the bottom is relaxed and the top takes some time with it instead of just jamming his dick in."

That Still Does Not Sound Right. "Their inherent impatience is still a reality."

"Men don't have to suck. They are choosing to suck of their own free will."

Enh. "Well, good thing there are people like you who are using their free will to be altruistic."

"Yes. I altruistically make sure people I fuck am having a good time, and altruistically go to plays with people who like plays, and altruistically don't get drunk with people who are sitting in surly silence and glaring at the bar like it killed their dog."

Snuggle. "Truly, you provide a service to the world. With your special arsehole."

[Splits off from life swarms with innocent monsters here.]

Cayden's arm is around Lae'zel's shoulder the entire way to his bedroll.

She's leaning into him companiobly. She's more smiling than he's seen her before too.

He scoops her and tosses her lightly onto the bedroll.

She tries to drag him down with her. 

He goes but he's laughing his ass off.

"You still haven't won yet." She is incapable of sounding serious or intimidating, his laughter is too infectious.

"What if I don't want to win?"

Oh, if he doesn't want to win, does that mean he'll let her roll him over and pin him?

Yes, but then he'll reach up and kiss her, so who is really the winner here?

"You aren't even trying." She kisses back.

"What am I supposed to be trying at?"

"You aren't even struggling. Not that I'm opposed to an easy victory."

"I have no reason to struggle, I'm right where I want to be." He kisses her cheek.

"A reasonable answer." A kiss with teeth to his jaw.

Mmm very nice he likes that.

He likes biting? Well, he has some very nice shoulder muscles that deserve to be nipped at. 

He makes very pleased noises about this and isn't trying to fight back at all. 

She very much can't complain about him not fighting back if he's going to make noises like that. 

He would fight back if he didn't want this to happen! But he does!

He starts trying to take Lae'zel's shirt off.

As much as it pains her, she's not going to fight back about that.

...as long as he's pliant about his own shirt coming off. 

Why would he not be? He likes this direction.

He pauses. "...are githyanki and humans interfertile?"

She's lean, and her breasts are more muscle than fat, but she definitely has them. 

"No. Unless you lay eggs and haven't told me." She nips at his now bare shoulder. "It's an advantage, I can sport all I like without the consequences your kin would have."

"Good to know!"

Normally animals that lay eggs don't have breasts but he'd heard about some shit from Sarusan. Anyway he has more important thoughts about her breasts now, such as that they should be in his mouth. 

A good choice!

...Cayden's  hair is very soft and pettable.

So it is.

Cayden is luring her to a life of languorous licentiousness with his soft and pettable hair. 

He is very warm and pettable and she is VERY distracted.

He is also distracted! Her hands are distracting him from the matter at mouth! He makes whimpery noises.

Cayden's whimpering noises are so good!

... please ignore any noises she's making. 

Well, if she keeps playing with Cayden's hair, he's going to be far too distracted to notice any whimpery noises.

Hmm, but maybe his head should be a little lower. 

He is intrigued by this plan!

Well, you see, his mouth could serve a higher purpose by being underneath her. 

This plan is not only intriguing but also excellent!

Maybe it's for the best that he's letting her lead, then. 

He affectionately strokes her legs while he's down there.

She is definitely in charge and not twitchy under his hands or making undone noises. 

Yep. In charge. That's the thing she is.

He is very sweet and very gentle and very, very good with his tongue. 

His hair is also still pettable, which is just unfair.

The noises go from stifled moans to full on panting.

He nudges her to adjust a bit, he hasn't quite adjusted to his current amount of need to breathe.

She's a bit too distracted to even consider not following his lead.

There are certainly no complaints about his current needs for breath.

He has had kind of a lot of practice in this position. 

Vlaakith's mercy, and it shows.

He reaches down and starts jerking himself off while he licks her.

Lae'zel is trying so hard to stay still and trying so hard to make embarrassing noises and she is getting worse and worse at both. 

But has she considered. She doesn't have to do those things. She can just move and make embarrassing noises. Cayden isn't going to tell.

... he has a point. And floofy hair. And a really good tongue.

Cayden is very wise about this thing. Not about anything else. 

She comes with a shudder and she has to avoid collapsing on top of him. 

Does she have to avoid that?

Presumably he would like to continue breathing?

She can collapse a little bit.

"What do you want?"

Action is more decisive than words. 

...action may also be easier than words.

She rolls off to lay next to his side, so she can kiss his hungrily and help him jerk off.

She is excellent at plans. Has anyone ever told her this?

He should.

"You are excellent at plans."

"I have been praised for my tactics before."

Her, preening? No, never. 

"You are-- mm-- a strategic mastermind."

Neck kiss. "And you are skilled at implementing those plans."

"I'm not doing anything! I'm just lying here!"

"You're lying here and letting me touch you. You're not getting in the way."

Now that's just asking for it.

He flips her. 

In her defence, if she wasn't slightly tipsy and lulled into a false sense of security, she could have avoided being flipped.

... she is so very flipped.

He laughs and returns to his previous position. 

... what is she meant to make of this?

She goes back to what she was doing. Cayden's reactions are fun. Even if they sometimes lead her to being inexplicably pinned.

Surely she knows what to make of this. Githyanki are competitive, aren't they?

Ah, but she's already proven she can pin him once. Or does he need it demonstrated again with more force?

He casually knocks her aside and says "sorry, I don't actually want to wrestle right now. My fault."

She is experiencing an emotion she refuses to name or acknowledge about being manhandled.

"Then stay still," she says between kissing his shoulders. 

He will follow orders. 

Mostly. 

How does she feel about squirming.

Squirming is relevantly staying still. 

... and more than encouraged.

Then he will squirm dramatically.

And she will continue doing whatever is making him most squirmy!

A delightful ending for all involved.

Normally this is the point she'd give feedback and leave,  but Cayden is warm and squishy and he's already had her head in his lap. She'll stay.

It had not occurred to Cayden that she might do something else.

She ends up passing out half draped over him. 

The next day--

Astarion and Cayden can sleep in the same tent, right?

Honestly, it's only space efficient.

Yep. Space efficiency. Definitely not that Cayden likes very cold cuddles.

It would be simply awful if their fearless leader died of hypothermia because they were too spread out.

"And cuddling you helps with that?"

"You'd simply freeze without me to warm your bed."

"Mmhm." He kisses Astarion's nose.

Cayden isn't even the warmest person he's taken to bed-- there was that fire genasi that one time-- or the snuggles, but he can luxuriate in it a little more. He's not going to have to lead him into the jaws of Cazador.

"You're lucky I'm such a generous person."

"I give thanks every day for your altruism and selflessness. Honestly baffling you aren't a cleric of Sarenrae yet."

"Why do we have Shadowheart when we have me.  I'm so much better at making people feel better."

"You really are," he says. 

Kissing?

Kissing is very much on the table! As is stroking Cayden's back. 

Happy Cayden noises!

It's great when people are easy to please.

Does Cayden feel this positively about his butt being groped?

He feels very pleased about this!

Most of him feels pleased about this. His dick seems apathetic.

Okay, it's probably just that his body is not all quick on the uptake today. This is a fixable problem that he can work with. He's not on a time limit.

He's just going to keep kissing him and playing with his butt and thighs and something will happen.

It doesn't seem to be fixing itself! Even though Cayden is making very pleased noises and exploring which parts of Astarion's body are erogenous zones. (Shoulders? Nipples? Elbows?)

On the one hand: it's not like he has to take him back to Cazador. It doesn't matter if Cayden is disinterested.

On the other, and also all the of the tentacles that are going to be bursting out of their faces if they don't fix this: any plan that requires defeating Cazador-- Hells, any plan that requires not being thrown back to him with a gift wrapped bow around his throat-- requires Cayden to like him and consider him useful. And giving Cayden a good time is the best way to do that and it's not working.

Okay. Barely concealed panic will not help the situation. Suave unruffled calm might. 

He whispers into Cayden's ear, "Did you have any plans for tonight?"

"This is good."

"Glad to hear it." Oh come on. If Cayden wants to play guessing games he can, but come on. 

"Sorry my dick's not cooperating but I can still suck you or give you a handjob if you want."

What is the answer you want, Cayden? "You've been far too nice to me already."

"I have been exactly as nice to you as you deserve."

In the absence of Astarion evincing a preference Cayden will return to Erogenous Zone Investigation. What about Astarion's belly?

The answer to that question is that he's kind of ticklish!

Investigation unsuccessful!

"Look," he says, "I know I don't look it, but I'm actually pretty old? And when you're as old as me your dick doesn't always work right. But that's no reason we can't have a good time."

"I don't want to leave you unsatisfied. Call it professional pride."

"If you needed a hard dick to be satisfied women who fuck women would be having a time."

"...we're stuck in a self sacrifice loop, aren't we? We're just going in circles going 'oh no, you take the last piece of cake.'" 

"No, I'm not sacrificing anything. I actually and genuinely enjoy kissing and touching you even when I can't get it up, and I also actually and genuinely enjoy sucking you off in the same situation."

He smiles. "And he would I be to deny you in that case, then."

Well, that's settled!

He puts his mouth on Astarion's dick.

Cayden is very good at this. 

Astarion plays with his hair. If he can't make Cayden enjoy it directly, he can at least make it clear he's enjoying himself and hope Cayden likes that. 

Cayden appears to be entirely oblivious to all the drama happening in Astarion's head, but very interested in the head of his dick. 

Astarion wouldn't dare to disagree with his dick being fascinating.

It's very fascinating! Cayden is fascinated by it. 

Cayden might not notice hair petting, but surely he can't miss cut off breathy moans?

He will do more of whatever leads to moans!

Lucky for him,  Astarion is easily pleased when he's trying to make things worthwhile.

The only person Astarion is sabotaging here is himself!

Cayden can't explain this because his mouth is full and also he's not telepathic.

Cayden is really incredible at sucking dick.

He honestly is, and Astarion is not putting it on all that much. 

"There-- like that--"