May 21, 2022 3:07 PM
an ex-illithid in lyingverse
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"Oh! Paying for things! With money! I have a money!" She digs around in her pockets and triumphantly produces a single silver coin. "...Probably this is not enough money to pay for an appointment. I didn't know I needed to pay for those. If I want more money, how should I obtain it?"

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"You should get a job. There might be signs in windows saying who's hiring."

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"Okay!" She puts her coin away. "I will find a job and a home and come back when I have both so I don't make you uncomfortable. How much money will I need to pay for an appointment?"

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"Five hundred dollars unless you have insurance in which case it's actually a lot more but the insurance pays most of it. We only take these kinds." She taps a sign on the wall. "The paperwork to start taking a new kind is horrendous and the only reason to do it would be to get more patients, and Dr. Ledecky has plenty already."

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"I don't have insurance! I will come back when I have five hundred dollars and am not homeless. Unless I find another neurologist first. Thanks for your help, goodbye!"

Off she trots to see if she can find any signs in windows about people hiring for jobs.

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The grocery store is hiring, and a temp agency, and a bar!

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She isn't sure what any of those things are but she can inquire within one by one as she encounters them. Grocery store first.

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The grocery store appears to sell food! It's not immediately obvious where to go for a job as opposed to where to go for food (any of these aisles).

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She looks up and down the aisles for anyone who pattern-matches to the receptionist (staying in one place waiting for petitioners to approach), as opposed to looking more like they're here to find food (wandering the aisles like she is).

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There are a bunch of people staying in one place waiting for petitioners to approach, ringing up groceries! They're all wearing matching aprons.

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She looks for the one with the shortest line and waits in it.

When she gets to the front, she says, "I'm not here for food right now, I'm looking for a job and the sign said hiring but it didn't say who to talk to so I'm guessing."

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"I'm annoyed that you were in line in front of me," volunteers the person behind her.

"You should talk to the people at that desk," says the cashier, pointing at a desk labeled CUSTOMER SERVICE.

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"Sorry!" she says to the person behind her, and "thank you!" to the cashier, and then she goes over to the Customer Service desk. It's even more receptionist-pattern-matching than the cashiers, but it seems to be a little more out-of-the-way, which might explain why she didn't see it at first.

"Hello!" she says to Customer Service. "The sign outside said Hiring and the person over there said you are the people to talk to about the sign."

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"We are!" says Customer Service. Her nametag says TRICIA. "Do you want to interview right now?"

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"Sure! What does interviewing consist of?"

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"You just fill out this form here and then I'll ask you a couple questions." Form! It wants her name and address and phone number and to know if she has ever committed any crimes and whether she expects she can carry out various grocery store related tasks such as lifting heavy objects.

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Her name is Bird and she doesn't have an address or a phone number and she doesn't think she has committed any crimes but can't be sure because she doesn't know the local laws (she scribbles marginalia accordingly) and she totally does expect she can lift heavy objects!

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Customer Service beholds this. "You didn't write in your address or phone number."

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"I don't have those! I am looking for a job because I want money so that I can afford a home and some other things. I'm not actually sure what a phone is but maybe when I have money I will get one."

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"People who don't have a home smell bad after a while because they don't shower or do laundry enough," says Customer Service. "I can't hire you if you're going to smell bad."

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"I think I smell normal for a human! I'm not sure though. It hadn't occurred to me to wonder." She wrinkles her nose thoughtfully. "How do people without homes get them, if a job isn't the answer?"

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"I think some jobs probably care less if you smell bad, or you could get a gym membership and shower there. The Gold's Gym is doing a promotion where you get the first month of membership free but then they automatically charge you. If you do that and have a place to do laundry too I can hire you."

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"I think I can manage that!" she says, envisioning washing her clothes in the same place where she bathes. "Where is the Gold's Gym? I will go there and get a membership and come back."

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"It's that way til Water Street and then you turn left."

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"Okay, thank you!" And she's off. This endeavour sure has a lot of steps.

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