"Sanctuary and protection. I've always thought you shouldn't promise things you can't give."

"It's a numbers game. It does the best anyone has ever been able to figure out how to do." He smiles. "I've been fed the party line for long enough, you could say."

"He tried his best would be the world's most popular epitaph if it meant anything."

"Maybe, but it's a magical construct. It can do nothing but its best."

"What a miserable way to be."

"We can hope for its sake it's less sentient than most mals around. It did never decide to just eat us all instead of carrying on, for a blessing."

"Well. A blessing if you think we matter more than the good people of Patience and Fortitude."

"...I suppose that is a trade I hadn't thought of. Four thousand kids die swiftly, so that however many those two have been torturing for decades finally get their release."

"It's not pleasant to think about, I'm not exactly surprised you haven't. You only get a few thoughts each day that aren't 'how do I kill that, again?'; it makes sense you'd ration them."

"I think it's more about prioritising them than rationing them," he says, side-eyeing Lex for a second again.

"Prioritize, he says." Lex leans back in his chair. "Your priorities, Lake, are fucked. You've spent a solid eighteen hours being insulted nonstop because you get off on it."

"Not quite how I would put it."

"Isn't it? Amaze me, then, with your interpretation."

"I spent eighteen hours being insulted because words are wind and behind that prickly persona you are a fun and interesting person with unusual insights who could use a friend." And, hell, he's on an emotional honesty binge anyway. "And honestly so could I, having people who aren't reflexively kissing my ass everywhere I go is very refreshing."

Lex's eyes are not a little bit shiny at all when he says "I'm glad I entertain you, then, as long as the novelty hasn't worn off."

"Novelty's fun and all," he says, not lifting his gaze from this work, "but like I said, I could use a friend."

"You've got a friend in Pevensie, don't you?"

He laughs. "I could use two friends, then. Call me greedy."

"Not what I'd call you."

Class begins to end. Lex stands and stretches. "Remind me never to forget to bring the skull to alchemy ever again, I need it every time I leave it in my room and I'll bore myself to tears if I keep having to talk to you instead of making hideous poisons."

"You seem a talented boy, I'm sure you can multitask. What's your next class?"

"Something or other to do with creative writing. I'm debating whether to keep trying to avoid the word despair or just shoot the villanelle I'm working on in the head and start something about cleansing flame, which I might be able to actually keep on track."

"I have language hall, so that's at least close enough to yours that I can keep cramping your style almost all the way there."

"Relentlessly. Well, might as well get going."

Upstairswards, then, and the other kids in class who might normally have walked with Scorpius didn't because Lex was there and they were very sure something was going wrong there even if they didn't quite know what. Just as well, Scorpius was kind of not really feeling playing up the dashing hero today for some reason.

"...seems more like I'm cramping your style than you mine," Lex observes eventually. "The strong tailwind of popularity apparently can't quite compete with my malefic doldrum."