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She's leaving Tim Hortons with several cups of coffee in her hands, big black bags under her eyes, and blank expression on her face. She's not doing a great job at looking where she's going.
cara's awakening goes less well
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She pulls back just enough to watch Cara's throat work as she swallows. Her thumb traces the line of her jaw, feeling the muscles move under skin.
"Now open your eyes."
She studies those empty eyes for a long moment.
"Chemists call it diethyl ether, as if naming it could tame it. As if syllables could contain what burns like winter lightning on the tongue. I know its history: the sweet sleep it once brought to surgical tables, the gentle drift into nothingness before they found safer ways to steal consciousness. Now it lives in laboratories, patient in its glass prisons, waiting. A few drops would kiss like fire. A sip would pull you under—not forever, just long enough. Just enough to float away from this particular moment, this particular choice, this particular weight of being a Person.
It promises temporary erasure without permanent consequence. A chemical vacation. The burn would fade, the dizziness would pass, but for those precious minutes you could be anywhere else, anyone else.
Even the bottle feels significant in my palm - cool glass holding something that could remake the next hour of a life. Not death, just... distance. A chemical intermission.
Sweet ether. Honest ether. It won't lie to me about what it is or what it will do. Unlike everything else, it keeps its promises: burn, float, return. Simple as breathing. Simpler than breathing.
Just this once, to see what temporary feels like."
She drops her hand. "Sit back down. Cross your legs."
She watches Cara's unsteady descent to the bed, the way her body lists slightly to one side before correcting. The ether's working exactly as advertised - that beautiful chemical distance already creeping in at the edges.
"Look at me." She waits for those glassy eyes to find hers. "You're going to stay right there until I tell you otherwise. Hands on your knees. Back straight."
She crosses to her desk, considering.
Hands go to her knees. She straightens her back and tries very hard not to droop, though the ether is making that harder every second.
She pulls out her phone and sets a timer. Twenty minutes. The ether won't last much longer than that, not at that dose. She sets the phone on the desk where she can see it, then moves to stand behind Cara.
"Count backwards from one hundred. Out loud. Slowly." Her fingers brush the nape of Cara's neck, just enough contact to keep the guiding flowing. "If you lose track, start over."
"One Hundred. Ninety-Nine. Ninety-Eight. Ninety-Seven. Ninety-Six. Ninety-Fiii... Ninety-Five. Ninety-Four. Ninety-Threeeeeeeeee. Ninety-Twooooooooooooo...."
She appears to be struggling.
She circles around to face Cara, watching her struggle with the simple task. Those stretched-out numbers, the way her mouth can't quite form the shapes right anymore. Perfect.
"Start over." She keeps her voice level, clinical. "From one hundred. And if you slur again, start over."
The timer shows seventeen minutes left. Plenty of time.
"One hundred, Ninety N-niiiine, N- One hundred, Ninety-Nine, Nineeeeety Eii. One Hundred, Ninetyyyyyy - One Hunnnnnd - One Huuuundre - One Hundred, Ninety Nine, Ninety Eight, Ninety Seveeeeeee"
She reaches out and presses two fingers to Cara's lips, stopping the slurred counting.
"Shh." She keeps her fingers there for a moment, watching those vacant eyes try to focus. "New game. Blink once for yes, twice for no. Understand?"
She withdraws her fingers slowly, dragging them across Cara's lower lip as she goes.
"Good. Are you dizzy?" She watches those unfocused eyes, waiting. The timer shows twelve minutes. The ether should be peaking right about now.
"Do you know where you are?"
She circles around behind Cara again, letting her fingertips trail across the girl's shoulders. The contact is light but constant - just enough to keep the connection alive while she waits for an answer.
She pauses her circling, fingers stilling on Cara's shoulder. Interesting.
"Good girl. Being honest." She moves to stand in front of Cara again, tilting her chin up with one finger. "Do you know who I am?"
The timer shows ten minutes. Still plenty of time to play.
She lets out a soft laugh. "No? That's alright." Her thumb strokes along Cara's jaw, maintaining that gentle contact. "I'm the one taking care of you right now. That's all you need to know."
She glances at the timer. Eight minutes. The ether should be starting its slow fade soon.
"One more question, and then we'll be done with this game. Are you feeling scared?"
"No?" Her thumb traces along Cara's jawline, considering. "That's alright. I'm Vera. Your sister, remember?"
She lets that sink in for a moment, watching those unfocused eyes. The ether's doing its job beautifully - that perfect chemical fog making everything negotiable.
"Say it. Say 'Vera is my sister.'"
She's going to kiss her again, because doing it while she was dazed and unresponsive wasn't enough for her.