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Jane Russell
"The Erogamer"
LVL: 1 (0%)
Stats
DOM: 30/130
SUB: 50/280
BOD: 13 (+)
LST: 12 (+)
SED: 8 (+)
FUK: 8 (+)
PRV: 12 (+)
ERO: 10 (+)
Points: 5
Money:Status Effects: 'Innocent' Virgin
Description: Jane Russell is a college freshmen majoring in Undecided, currently recovering from being dumped by her high school boyfriend three weeks into a long-distance relationship which he swore would be just fine and she had nothing to worry about. Unbeknownst to her, something called the "Erogame" has just decided to help with that.'
Skills:
Erogamer's Body (Lvl MAX): The biological ability to live your life as an erogame. Venereal disease doesn't exist for you, or pregnancies or periods. Arbitrarily large appendages can fit inside any of your orifices. You heal from all injuries with a good night's sleep, ready for the next day's adventures. Other aspects of this skill depend on the BOD stat.
Erogamer's Mind (Lvl MAX): The mental flexibility to live your life as an erogame. You're more able to accept the realities of your new world. You'll also bounce back from painful, upsetting and bizarre sexual experiences with relative ease. Rape can be anything from a recoverable trauma to a Tuesday afternoon, but it won't ruin your life. Other aspects of this skill depend on the FUK, SED, LST, and PRV stats.Erogamer's World (Lvl MAX): The consent of reality to live your life as an erogame. People are never too preoccupied to consider sex or romance, not while you're around. Bystanders won't ignore what you do, but they're unlikely to actually stop you. Those who do decide to involve themselves are drawn into the logic of the Erogame. If you go far enough that an authority sees no choice but to intervene… they won't treat you as a simple criminal. Other aspects of this skill depend on the ERO stat.
To Mine Own Me Be True (Lvl MAX): Even at the center of the Erogame, you are not just an erogame character, but a human being possessed of her own free will. Your family will always be safe from you, and little children everywhere.
Perks:
Everything's Better With Ero: On every quest and every path you walk, taking the option that turns you on more will never lead to worse results in the long run than taking the option that seems safe, sensible, and practical. This perk does not operate by reducing the rewards of safe, sensible, practical-seeming paths.
Info // Status Effects// 'Innocent' Virgin
Merely existing in the age of the Internet has already raised your PRV stat above 10. Still, until you choose to lose your virginity, the Erogame will not force you to give it up.
Info // Character Stats // Level:
At LVL 1, and 0% progress toward the next level, you'll never be this weak again. You can increase your level by completing the quests the Erogame offers you, or by causing romantic and sexual events to happen to you or around you. The more difficult the challenge, the greater the rewards.
Info // Character Stats // Body:
With the average being 10, and perfect 10s being 40, your BOD of 13 is above average pretty. You'll never be the most head-turning girl in your class, but you're no slacker either.
You can increase this stat through exhibitionism, and other acts that invoke the pure beauty and power of your physical form.
Info // Character Stats // Lust:
At a LST of 12, you usually have to jerk off to go to sleep, but it doesn't bother you that much the rest of the time.
You gain in this stat while experiencing sexual urges that are unusually intense or that go on unusually long.
Info // Character Stats // Seduction:
Your SED of 8 reflects less your innate charm and more the fact that seducing guys your own age mostly requires the ability to go "hey, wanna fuck?"
You can increase this stat by arousing the romantic interest or sexual desire of others, and successfully pursuing them or being caught.
Info // Character Stats // Fucking:
Your FUK of 8 shows that, while being thoughtful and considerate counts, and a strong grasp of the relative theory counts, there's only so far you can get without hands-on experience.
How do you increase this stat? Take a guess.
Info // Character Stats // Perversion:
Your PRV of 12 shows that you have looked for porn upon the Internet, and managed not to completely avoid the dubious products of Rule 34. But you're still not quite sure what you like yet.
You can increase this stat by being a little less close-minded, and acting accordingly.
Info // Character Stats // Erogame Logic:
At an ERO of 10, your life has become an erogame taking place in a mostly realistic setting. What happens to you might seem unlikely to others, but it won't break their belief in a sane universe… yet. Witnesses will reach for explanations other than the Erogame, but they'll still notice the unusual events.
If you keep pushing probability to its limits, then probability will learn to be a bit more flexible down there, relax and take it in and not protest so much.
Info // Character Stats // Dominant and Submissive Energy:
If this were a different game, you'd have mana and hit points, and they'd refill from you sitting on your ass.
LOL.
Okay brain, you're right, I need to stop being so fucked up about Ryan, and you've come up with a very clever dream to hit me over the head with this.
She pauses.
On the other hand, this doesn't feel like a dream. On the other other hand, I've had dreams before that involved thinking "this doesn't feel like a dream" and then I wake up and realize no, that's totally what dreams are like lol. On the... how many hands was that?... whatever, the point is maybe college is making me more sleep deprived than I realized.
Her next class is a huge lecture where the professor doesn't take attendance. She decides to lie down, closes her eyes, and hopes that she'll no longer be hallucinating after a quick nap.
Okay, what's a test I can do to confirm I am definitely going insane, because clearly that's what's happening here, right?
She studies the purple text. "Arbitrarily large appendages can fit inside any of your orifices," it says. In theory, that should be easy to test. Except, as much as she's feeling desperate after getting dumped by Ryan, she's not quite ready to ask a random guy from down the hall to fist her yet. Except... she could do it to herself, right? And her mouth is an orifice, right? Not being entirely sure what the word "orifice" means, she Googles it, and discovers that the category "human orifices" technically includes ears, nostrils, tear ducts, and the urethra. Was the purple text really promising she could now get nose-fucked? She didn't need that image in her head. And regardless of what the text was claiming, she's definitely going to start smaller than that.
Here goes nothing, she thinks, as she tries to insert her entire hand into her mouth.
Jane yanks her hand out of her mouth. Did I used to be able to do that? Maybe insanity has just made my jaw unusually limber. She decides to try again, and keep going until she's elbow deep in her own mouth.
Oh god what did I just do?
More importantly, what does +1 ERO mean? Jane quickly skims the purple text until she finds the relevant section.
Info // Character Stats // Erogame Logic
At an ERO of 11, your life has become an erogame taking place in a mostly realistic setting. What happens to you might seem unlikely to others, but it won't break their belief in a sane universe yet. Witnesses will reach for explanations other than the Erogame, but they'll still notice the unusual events.
If you keep pushing probability to its limits, then probability will learn to be a bit more flexible down there, relax and take it in and not protest so much.
Jane rereads the text very carefully this time, trying to parse what it's implying. Is it saying that if she keeps trying to swallow her own arm, things will start happening to her that will break other people's belief in a sane universe? Or is it saying they'll stop noticing unusual events? And that first sentence... is it saying that a higher ERO score will make the real world... less realistic? What would that even mean?
Trying to make sense of it all, she goes back and studies the entire wall of text in front of her. It's attempting to be reassuring with "To Mine Own Me Be True" and "Everything's Better With Ero", but if this is like... aliens blasting text directly into her eyeballs or whatever, she's not sure she trusts the aliens' concept of "safe" or "worse results in the long run." She's also regretting not taking a picture of herself with her arm down her own throat, just to have some tangible proof she didn't imagine it, but she decides not to repeat the experiment, because if she's not going insane she doesn't want to increase the amount of collateral weirdness she inflicts on everyone around her.
She checks the time. If she hurries, she can make it to class on time—she didn't nap at all. Honestly I was kidding myself about being tired, she thinks as she leaves her dorm room.
Quest available: Size Queen
1. Take something at least 6'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +1000 XP.
2. Take something at least 12'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +5000 XP, +1 FUK
3. Take something at least 18'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +10,000 XP, +1 LST
4. Take something more than two feet in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +15,000 XP, 'Size Queen' skill.
Aaaaaaaah.
Jane's pace picks up even more than it already had. If anything else freaky happens she just might break into a run. She doesn't actually expect to be able to run away from the purple letters, but the alternative is screaming "nope, nope, nope" out loud. Apart from all the other issues with the "quest", Jane is not sure she needs to do anything that will make her (permanently?) hornier right now. She is going to go to class and then after class she is going to come up with a less horrifying way to test if she has gone completely insane or not.
The class is a literature class! The professor has decided to scrap the syllabus for today and instead teach Goblin Market by Christina Rossetti.
This is an uncomfortably horny poem.
At first, the new lesson plan feels like, at worst, the universe playing a tasteless joke on her by making her read about a young maid who "She suck’d and suck’d and suck’d"—on fruit of course. Then as the poem went on, and described how the two sisters had suffered as a consequence of their encounters with the goblin merchants, Jane started to suspect she was being threatened. Yet she wasn't sure she was being threatened with—or even what the universe was trying to coerce her into doing. The obvious answer was it was trying to get her to take on the "quest" she'd just been given, but the poem's protagonists seemed to suffer more for responding to the call than refusing it. Maybe after class she'd try improving her BOD, which seemed relatively safe and relatively easy to verify, and would hopefully placate the universe, or the aliens, or whoever was behind all this, without her having to shove a traffic cone into three different orifices.
Jane noticed that she was suddenly just assuming all of... whatever this was was real. But if it is real, she told herself, ignoring it could be a hell of a lot more dangerous than just having a psychotic break, so in some ways I'm playing it safe, right? Right?
If the Erogame has a position on whether or not it is real, it doesn't tell Jane what it is.
Jane decides that once the horny literature class is over, her plan will be as follows:
- Take pictures of herself from various angles.
- Go to the women's locker room of the campus gym—because that's where they have one of those scales like at the doctor's office that uses an actual balance, rather than a spring scale that bounces around depending on how you stand on it.
- Weigh self, naked (another benefit of being in a locker room). Take picture of scale reading.
- Take more pictures of self, naked, from various angles.
- ???
- BOD goes up.
- Repeat, compare photos.
Jane may notice that she has five unassigned stat points she can put in whatever she wants.
Jane is not entirely sure how stat increases work. The purple text doesn't seem to come with drop-down menus. "Uh... help? Search how to raise stats?" she says, hopefully not too loudly.
Ohhh. Right. So the plan is:
- Take pictures of herself from various angles.
- Go to the women's locker room of the campus gym—because that's where they have one of those scales like at the doctor's office that uses an actual balance, rather than a spring scale that bounces around depending on how you stand on it.
- Weigh self, naked (another benefit of being in a locker room). Take picture of scale reading.
- Take more pictures of self, naked, from various angles.
- Air-finger the little plus sign next to BOD.
- BOD goes up.
- Repeat, compare photos.
Jane considers taking her clothed "before" pics outside the gym, but then realizes the locker room mirror will probably be helpful for that. So she strides into the gym, flashes her student ID, and walks directly to the locker room, doing her best to show no sign of hesitation. Because taking progress pics is a perfectly normal thing to do, and not at all a sign she is having a psychotic break.
Is it Jane's imagination or are the people in this locker room dressed more skimpily than usual?
Hopefully it's not her imagination, because that would make her plan to prance around the locker room naked less conspicuous. After getting front, back, and side pics in the locker room mirror, find an open locker, shoves her backpack inside, strips completely naked, and puts her clothes inside too. Then, carrying nothing but her phone, she heads towards the scale.
