"Well, if you feel the need to help, be my guest, I'd hate to see them go to waste. - you know, we are going to have to eat human-normal amounts of food if we want the baby to think she's being raised by human parents. I guess we're going to have to do a lot of things on that front. Take showers, appear to ever sleep..."

"I take showers. Showers are great."

"Huh. Maybe I'll get used to them. I don't think I've bothered since the last time I got covered in mud. Sleeping, though, you'd lose all that time. I'll have to cut so many things out of my schedule. I probably won't even be able to get that old nursing home to rehire me for a few weeks every year. But I suppose averting the end of the world is probably worth a few sacrifices. We should buy a bed, I think not owning a bed is even more suspicious than not sleeping in it. We wouldn't have to really sleep in it, we could just, you know, rewatch all of Star Trek."

"I mean, I don't think you sleep much with a newborn anyway, and when she's a toddler she'll go to sleep before we do. But yeah we should get a bed. Beds are good for cuddles."

"I don't want to have to explain the sudden appearance of one when she's four. And yes. Cuddles are good."

A few days later, at midnight, the voice of Freddie Mercury tells Lev that THE ANTICHRIST IS READY, and he leaves.

Kairiel paces, and eats some cake, and triple-checks that all of the baby things are set up, and paces some more.

A few hours later, Lev returns home, carrying a sleeping swaddled baby in his arms. He's staring at her with utter adoration. 

Eeee!

"Is she - is this, uh, the one that we stole that we're keeping or the one that we stole that you're giving back - "

"This is Marie," Lev says. "There was a second woman giving birth at the nunnery. Nice family, they were called the Youngs. I found a very confused nun named Sister Mary Loquacious and confused her a bit more, and now the nuns think the baby transfer happened and every baby is going home with its biological parents, except Marie, who went home with us."

She makes a very delighted sound in the process of preventing herself from saying 'you are so good.'

"I love you. I love you I love you I love you. I love her. She's so small."

"She has," Lev announces in the tone of a person revealing a great and important truth, "ten toes."

Kairiel gasps appropriately and makes another delighted sound.

"They are SO SMALL. I got to nom them."

How are the most delightful people in existence a demon and the antichrist. It's not fair. How are they hers, also not fair but she's not going to internally complain about that one.

"Everything's set up. I checked. Again."

"Okay. Maybe if I put her down in her crib very very gently she won't wake up."

"Maybe!"

She holds her breath in anticipation of seeing whether this works. This is easy because she doesn't actually need to breathe.

Baby Marie is NOT A FAN OF THIS PLAN.

She wakes up immediately to express her SERIOUS DISPLEASURE at not being snuggled by the BIG WARM SOFT THING.

It's okay! The Big Warm Thing can pick her up!

The Big Warm Thing has read MANY books about babies and he is going to rock her back and forth in his arms while going "shhhhhhhh" and giving her a finger to suck on.

This is acceptable. Good big warm thing. In a few minutes she's feeling sleepy again.

The big warm thing sits in a rocking chair and summons a book to his hand. 

This is also acceptable. The big warm thing may continue this course of activity.

Kairiel is just going to sit nearby and beam at them and bask in the fact that she has a family and her family is incredibly indescribably wonderful and she is a part of it and they are hers. 

Lev is having a hard time reading, a thing which otherwise never happens, because he keeps beaming in delight at his Marie and his Kairiel (<33333). 

His life is so wonderful.

Wow she hopes she has more than eleven years of this. Of course the baby is going to be a baby for less than that. But still.