"You can't believe everything you read in a newspaper," the girl, who must be Rachel, says. "Actually, Spider-man helps lots of people."

(She's so pretty. You want to believe whatever she says, because then she'll smile at you and touch you and that sounds like the best thing in the world.)

...maybe he should be a little less clinging to the ceiling. Sasha drops to the ground, lands on his feet, and stands the normal way that human beings stand. 

Kraven looks really uncertain.

He also looks really, really distracted by Rachel.

Thank you Rachel you're the bomb Rachel. 

"Can we go home," he says, deliberately pitches his voice to sound younger than he usually does. 

"Take off your mask," Kraven says, "so I can see how old you are."

Sasha hesitates, then — Kraven won't recognize him — pulls up his mask to show the bottom half of his face. 

He looks very young and very tired. 

Kraven snaps a picture and runs. 

Yep how about he leaves right now immediately. 

Rachel lifts up her shirt and says "hey, everyone, look at my boobs."

Kraven hesitates for just a second--

Sasha grabs the camera and ducks into the floor and goes. 

When Sasha gets back to Stark Tower, Lev is there in the living room.

Chris has crossed his arms and is glaring at everything.

"Hey," he says, and hugs Lev. "You doing okay?" 

"I woke up and Chris was carrying me through a sewer? Are you okay, apparently someone was trying to kill you--"

"I'm okay! I'm very very good at dodging. — I'm a little freaked out but like, mostly because you got kidnapped." 

He goes to take the mask off, pauses, turns to Chris. "Don't tell anyone about this?" 

"I can keep a secret."

Sasha takes the mask off, all the way this time, and kisses Lev. 

"--ah. So that's why we don't know who you are."

"That is why you don't know who I am," he agrees. 

"Do you need a heal?"

"I don't think so but I should still check." He takes off the suit; there's no broken skin under it. "Doesn't look like it, no. I'm going to go get clothes." 

Chris looks at him appreciatively.

So does Lev.

Sasha has the cutest boyfriend ever. 

He comes back out in sweatpants and one of Lev's shirts, drapes himself across Lev. 

"I'm fine, really," he says. "I was unconscious for the entire thing and woke up being carried by a hot guy."