"Moooore or less? I mean, there is a sense in which some days I'm a boy or a girl, so yeah, kinda, but it's like—I feel like a girl, I look like a girl, it takes a bit for me to notice yesterday I didn't."

"… I mean I'm pretty sure I feel as I should, but I feel different from before I was a vampire."

"Your power isn't about shapeshifting, though, and you feel like people are snacks."

"Yeah, but it doesn't seem like something to remark on, necessarily, that you feel like– you."

"I mean, I sometimes don't feel like me? But usually that's not a physical thing."

"It's not that I feel like me, it's that I—don't feel dysphoric. Like, I don't feel like it's weird at all to look like whatever I look, no matter how weird it should be to one day wake up a different biological sex."

"– Huh, okay. Uh. I'm not sure how you would go straight from that to doing something with it, no."

"Well the obvious thing to try is figuring out whether I can purposefully feel like whatever."

"… Which sounds hard to do unless it gives you some sort of mechanism? Or we resort to something complicated like drugs?"

"Drugs... might work but I'm not sure it's the right frame of mind. I could see something like meditation helping, here, though."

Evelyn gets her phone out and taps a few times and shows Sadde the phone. "The internet is so convenient."

The phone is on a page that explains some meditation techniques.

"I don't think I'm gonna learn to meditate meaningfully today, and besides, it's gonna be really boring."

"Probably not as boring as staring at threads, but yeah."

"I dunno, I've never been one to really sit still and not do anything."

"I've never been one to stare at bizarre non-objects somehow in but not clouding my vision, but here we are."

"No I just mean this would be really really—" Pause. Frown.

"… Boring?"

"Yes."

"Has anything seemed supremely boring to you, Theo?"

"… Not that I know of? Things have been made – very unimportant, like I try to ignore them by default?"

"Is that related to magic stuff directly?"

"It's – personhood, I sort of default to ignoring it if I'm hungry, so sort of."

"Feels like it's the last thing I should pay attention to, like pretty much anything else is more relevant or noteworthy or should be higher priority."

"… The threads are kinda like that too, so, this is a little bit of a pattern."

"I should heed my own advice and try doing the meditation thing, probably. But, maybe not now, because it will likely take a long time and it's probably best if I do it when I'm not around other people with other things to do."