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Taliar in Evil Arda
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Maitimo kisses him and murmurs I love you and then chokes him again, regarding him with patient adoration.

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He looks up at Maitimo with love and trust and struggles to breathe and - he's gone, all his senses drowned in the memory of pain, but he knows what's happening and he can still say, Love you forever.

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He's so good at that. He doesn't kill him - not very appealing, even knowing how easily it'd be fixed - but does let him lose consciousness.

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He wakes up frightened and disoriented, and he remembers that Maitimo is torturing him, and he relaxes immediately - still frightened, but at peace with it.

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That's the cutest thought Maitimo has ever read. Healing aura, he says, I'm going to blind you and tie you down and leave you here for a few weeks while I go out touring and I will not be amused if you starve while I'm gone.

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Oh, that's terrifying. That is utterly terrifying.

I love you, he says, and golden light fills the room.

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Kiss. I'm so proud of you, he says. I'm so delighted by you. Hold still.

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It's so nice to be appreciated.

He holds still.

Love you forever.

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He leaves him blinded and tied down with the pot of daffodils against his forehead, and goes on a tour of his kingdom to tell everyone what is going on. He touches Taliar's soul frequently. He asks other people to touch Taliar's soul less frequently, but there's still been thousands by the end of the trip. He goes by Nevrast. Findekáno is out of town. He is not amused but he does not chase him down.

 

He comes home. 

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Taliar spends a lot of time remembering the rockslide, remembering Nahira, or remembering both of them at once in unlikely and harrowing combinations. When he manages to sleep, he has the worst nightmares of his life.

There are times when he's lucid enough to consider taking a break to reach out his senses and work on the road across the Helcaraxe for a while. Every time, he decides against it, because that would be cheating.

He's pretty sure he could block Nahira's name from his mind on purpose, not perfectly but enough to have trouble recalling it when asked. He doesn't know if that would also be cheating. He is content to wait for Maitimo's opinion.

It's terrifying and agonizing and it does his sense of time no good at all, but as the days wear on, he finds that the effect is wearing off. He can sometimes smell the daffodils without hearing Nahira's voice. He can sometimes lie there blinded and immobilized and still feel capable of breathing.

By the time Maitimo comes home, Taliar can go almost an hour at a time without being ambushed by memories of terror. He's beginning to worry that he might go long enough between flashbacks to get bored.

And he misses Maitimo terribly. The soul-touching helps a lot with that, but he still misses everything else. Cuddling in Maitimo's lap, kissing him, seeing his face...

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Did you have a nice time while I was gone, dear?

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He actually laughs. How is he even supposed to answer that—well, ask a silly question—

Maitimo my love, it's been weeks since you last fucked me. I consider that a terrible time.

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That is astonishingly easy to fix.

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Taliar loves his beautiful brilliant terrifying boyfriend so much.

Missed you.

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Missed you too. Very much. Cuddles.

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Cuddles. Gazing adoringly at Maitimo's beautiful face, which he particularly missed.

How was your tour? What'd you do? You know how much I love the way you handle your kingdom.

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So he'll tell and send him all about it. Pausing when he gets too distracted by having Taliar back in his arms.

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And Taliar will listen and snuggle and admire him and think of occasional insightful commentary. And enjoy the pauses very much.

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He takes a full day off to enjoy having his boyfriend back. Then he asks - name?

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For a second he can feel it not quite coming to mind, a tip-of-the-tongue feeling.

But then - Nahira.

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We're making progress. Kiss. Knife.

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...after the last few weeks, this is actually kind of relaxing.

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At some point I'm going to have to murder or horrifically mutilate you just to get a reaction. 

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Taliar laughs.

I am on a noticeable trajectory here, aren't I. Can't say I regret it, though...

It's a nice feeling, lying there calm and blissfully content while his boyfriend cuts him. Maybe not useful to their goals right at this moment, but nice.

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Well, if they're both enjoying it, hard to see what goals are being served badly. 

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