"… You realize this is Theo's house, right? Was– Theo's house."

"Mmhm," he says, and knocks.

Door opens! Theo is just about visible from behind it.

Matt blinks.

"What. The hell."

"Yes, exactly, can you come in so we can try to explain, I swear it's even more bizarre than you think it is."

"Is he even– did you prop his corpse—"

Theo shakes his head a little and waves.

What.

"You could also say things, you know, Theo, so this is a bit more plausible."

"I think he– I think he probably already sees that I'm me."

"Yeah," he says, somewhat emphatically.

And then he starts walking to the door.

In he goes, then.

And then when Matt gets through the door he turns to look at Theo and looks very concerned.

Theo shuts the door.

He is breathing very lightly! Matt continues to be very much a person, look how concerned he looks, he's not food.

(Ugh.)

It's not in fact that difficult for Theo to see Matt as a person! He is not very hungry.

"So, Theo's a vampire."

"A v—" he starts. Pause. More shrilly, this time: "A vampire?"

"I'm not gonna eat you," he says, trying to be reassuring.

"I– wh–" Pause. Again. "What?"

"Can you lift a very heavy thing or run very fast to demonstrate?" he asks Theo.

Well he can move to the kitchen door rather quickly. And then run back and upstairs. And then return.

"Does that help?"

"No! Why would that help! What! My issue is not doubting that you're a vampire it's that you are a vampire and I'm sorry for snapping, I really am, but what the hell."

Shrug. "Apparently he just up and became one randomly."

"… Up and became a vampire randomly."

"Yep. Know how I died, yeah, unintentional but then I woke up in a morgue."

Matt opens his mouth to say something, then just stops and looks vaguely sympathetic-stroke-very-confused.