"… Is this a 'you could use her as a test for audio sway' or is this a 'people should know I'm not dead', or…?"

"First one."

"Okay, so call her up and – see what she thinks of how wonderful I am or what, like, I feel like there might be a slight issue with what we're actually testing, though if I ask her to be serious and sincere she probably will be."

"Issue?"

"Hi there mother. I know you just recently thought I'd died, but I have a question to ask you. How wonderful do you think I am? Oh, no, I realize that you're my mother, I realize you have to say I'm wonderful as mothers typically do in a standard motherly way, just could you be honest this time, it's important, thanks." He rolls his eyes. "I probably shouldn't use the word 'wonderful', is my point, but I'm not sure what to replace it with. Asking her to be sincere will actually get her to be sincere, though."

"Then do, and maybe explain the whole thing? Or at least the Sway thing?"

"… Yeah, okay," he says. "Be right back, then."

And he goes to his room with his phone.

Matt looks slightly confused but shrugs.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Kinda confusing that all this is happening, but I think I'll get through it okay."

"Yeah, on the one hand I'm glad I'm not literally the only magical thing around, on the other what the duck."

"At least it didn't overwrite his personality into some psychopathic thing that kills literally everything," he says. "So it's better than at least one scenario I can think of. Also he's not a zombie, so make that two."

"Yeah, could definitely be much worse."

And then Theo is back, still on the phone with his mom! "I have explained everything and told her that I continue to be pretty sure I haven't had a psychotic break and she agrees that I probably haven't because I sound, quote, 'believeable'," he gives a probably-meaningful look, "and that even if I have, it's probably not going to harm things if I keep talking as though I am a vampire, at least until she gets back and can ascertain whether I'm crazy or not – which I probably am not, because, again, 'believable' and also she trusts me. Plus the fact that I'm back from the dead helps."

"And the fact that you hold Sway over her probably cinched it."

"I mean yeees, probably, so apparently audio – if it's that I have audio sway and it's not just the 'inherent sway' idea – is enough to beat human memories. But she kinda trusts me a lot anyway, and I should probably stop ignoring her now because she's still on the line. Anything to check, or is this about it…?"

"Probably about it I think."

So he says bye to his mom and that he'll probably call her back later and she says bye and then she's gone. "Am I still on house arrest or do we think I'd be safe to go somewhere and test if the vampire invitation rule applies to me?"

"I don't actually know, you'd be a better judge of that than any of us, but to be honest I'm not sure I want to risk any outdoor tests at all while it's sunny."

"Well, the sun's probably lower now, it being like five or something, but yeah, I should probably cover up if I go outside. Since it's presumably exposure to sun – it feels like that and the shade seemed to help – and not just 'you happen to not be under a roof, wow, enjoy burning' or something."

"Well I still don't really see a good reason not to wait until full sundown."

"Okay, yeah, I was just going through the list. Uh, we haven't tested holy water yet, not sure that we got a proper confirmation on running water, various other holy symbols, we're planning on testing echolocation later… Anything else to do with sway?"

"Well running water maybe try a sink? If crosses don't work I don't expect holy water or other holy symbols to, echolocation's probably also best at night, and I'm not sure about Sway..."

"I mean, a shower didn't do it so I was thinking something larger like a river, but I'll try the sink idea anyway."

So he does!

Nothing bad happens!

"Yeah river next I guess, at night, too. Uh, then I think we've actually run out of tests we can meaningfully perform with the contents of a middle class American teenager's house?"