Simplicio: Is it true that the Carlota Chelam is a Wicked Tyrant? I am a credulous fool, who believes whatever he is told.

Chelamio: It's all vile slander, and I shall disprove whatever lies you have heard. Also I am not at all Carlota Chelam in a wig.

Simplicio: I have heard tell that the duchess of Chelam considers herself the rightful empress!

Chelamio: She will settle for only half of the empire. 

Simplicio: What of the claims that she seeks to end the freedom of the pen because she is bad at writing pamphlets?

Chelamio: Carlota Chelam is an excellent pamphlet writer and wants to end the freedom of the pen before everyone else is humiliated. 

Simplicio: And is it true that she is a disgusting hag?

Chelamio: I am - I mean, she is - incredibly beautiful, and will have anyone who says otherwise whipped.

Simplicio: I have heard tell that her guards murder pamphleteers who insult her.

Chelamio: Those pamphleteers tripped and fell into a bed of knives.

Simplicio: I am enlightened! Though I am a credulous fool, I now know the truth of the matter, and shall tell the world what I have learned!