in color amentans meet hazel
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"Do you want their socks to periodically turn into cochroaches or anything because what the fuck."

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"That seems a bit much but I wouldn't strenuously object if he couldn't taste sugar for a month."

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"That seems a bit little - couldn't you have gotten into serious trouble -"

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"I'm not a very vindictive person."

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"Okay but I am. And you're sort of family."

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"Please do not turn anyone's socks into bugs."

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"Computer is annoyingly slow, forever? So are replacements?"

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"Maybe."

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Minor looks somewhat soothed. 

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Miranda pats his arm.

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"If someone tries to frame you for a serious crime their house will probably burn down while the elves were out shopping," he informs her, "and be replaced by a swamp full of fire-breathing salamanders who hate them in particular."

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"Thank you for thinking of the elves."

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"The elves?"

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"Anyone important enough to convincingly frame Miranda for something would have magical servants in their house."

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"That's a euphemism, they're a magical slave species. They were probably invented by someone terrible but now they exist and prefer to be as-is, I checked."

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"I didn't have any growing up, Mum's Muggleborn and Dad's a Muggle, but Minor's family have them and they have been thoroughly interviewed and they would be so sad if they were made to do anything else."

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"Bleah."

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"Our observing anthropologists were very concerned at first too, there are lots of people checking if house-elves actually want to be freed and they really really really do not."

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"Do they want anything else?"

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"Clear expectations and plenty of work and their associated wizard family behaving respectably with respect to prevailing wizard norms."

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"I think they probably also don't like horribly harsh punishments but that might just be extrapolating, I've never heard one actually express a preference their family lighten up."

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"I was sort of slotting that under 'clear expectations', they don't do things that get them punished if they know how to not."

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"How many species of sapients are there here?"

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