"Yeah, this is a neat city."

"Thanks! We mostly get orc and Dwarf tourists, Elves get distressed about all of the - well, orcs - around..."

"Elves are like that," says Cam. "Do they have some way to let orcs visit their cities?"

"They have these head-scarf thingies? I know someone who visited dozens of Elf cities uncovered and they all gave her this astonishingly pretty headscarf thing to cover up with, and she hit them all up two or three times, and then she came back here with them and sold 'em, paid for a car that way."

"...that's hilarious."

He grins toothily. "Elves. They're all right, just not as neighbors. How were you planning to get to Sergal?"

"It'd probably be awkward to carry you and my boyfriend. Is there some sort of local vehicle you know how to drive and would be pleased to keep or resell after we're gone?"

" - I can drive a car like that, yeah -" gesture -

"Cool, what color do you want it?"

"Uh. Green? How long does it take you to make a car?"

"Less than a minute, do you care what shade of green?"

"Darkish, not like neon?"

And here is a car in a pleasing shade of spruce. "Voilà."

" - woah. Woah. You know, I will give the Elf-gods a little credit, it's a good idea setting it up so people can meet you guys. Okay." And he gets behind the wheel of his pleasing spruce car.

Cam ushers Timothy in and catches him up on the conversation.

"Wonder why they dislike the Elf-gods. I can see why most sets do, but..."

"Good question. I'll ask." To the orc: "Timothy wants to know why the Valar are unpopular here."

"They arrested Sauron a thousand years ago over stuff he did several thousand years before that - he wasn't doing anything bad when they arrested him, and he was ours, and helped us out. They explained why and stuff but people mostly don't totally buy it, and eternal imprisonment is kind of a lot..."

Cam translates this for Timothy.

"Ah."

"I suppose I could provide perspective on that but 'yeah he was totally going to march you all into a stunningly awful war, millions of alternate universes I heard about from a sapient bar say so' is kind of a stretch."

"Exactly. Serious credit to the Sanity Valar for that, actually, because they made the right call with substantially less to go off..."

"Yeah. I will have to remember to hug Mirelótë later."

They head a bit north and the streets get narrower and the family sizes, already notable, get even larger, and everyone is wearing black. "I should probably find a place to park," their guide says. 

"Does the dress code apply to visitors?"