"Uh-huh."

He writes Findekáno and asks him to work up a blessing that recognizes this one specific guy and warns the viewer that he is confused about how to not force people to have sex with him. 

Embezzlement and deserting aren't really a big deal, are they.

Off goes the ship. He gets back to work.

And Governor Avalor will find in her office one morning someone who looks very much like an Elf except that you can feel the air pressure building as you walk near him, and the static electricity is doing wild things to loose papers.

She stands back.

"Hello."

"Hello. I apologize, I don't do it deliberately. Melkor. It's a pleasure to meet you. I'd have made an appointment but it would have been noticed; I can return if this visit is poorly timed."

"Noticed?" she says.

"By the Noldor? Probably not by Yavanna, I doubt she knows how to use a computer."

"And this is undesirable?"

"I have never quite seen eye to eye with them."

"Oh?"

"We have slightly different priorities and vastly different tactics. And I just find them obnoxious, honestly."

"I see." She did her reading. Maybe if she lets him make his pitch she can sell a recording of it to the Elves to be left the fuck alone by all these damned aliens.

"I presume they were not so irresponsible as to fail to mention that they paroled their evil god and invited him to visit, were they?"

"They have many defects. Can I help you?"

"Yes, I want to manufacture a crisis that draws the ships out and then hide this planet so they can't find it again and I do not want this to be a secondary catastrophe for peoples who were planning on their continued presence."

She's not sure they're a net negative. They might learn to be less stupid eventually. "Why's that?"

"They're taking some people to Valinor. One of the princes ran off with a red girl with the right instincts for playing to his savior complex, they're taking prisoners off anyone who will hand them over, they're settling them all in in paradise and the rulers of Valinor are reactionary, reflexively self-righteous, and possessed with power wildly out of scale to their experience using it - to a degree that makes the Noldor look impressively competent, honestly - you know that we can swear to things, right? I swear that everything I have told you and am telling you is true. We can see the future - just glimpses, and things you see you cannot do anything to change. There is an occasion in the future where some nation sends an army to invade Valinor and the Valar respond by destroying the planet the invaders come from. I swear that I didn't leave out anything I know to make it sound worse- someone attempts an ill-advised invasion, they repel it without blinking and then destroy the planet because they're upset they had the nerve to try.

That's a thousand years away, and not your species. But I can tell you what's going to happen here and now. Someone will do something wrong. Probably one of the people they've so ill-advisedly brought to Valinor, but it could also be something here, if it were bad enough. They're misleading you about how immortal they are. On average Mandos takes twelve of your years to do a resurrection, royals are very concerned with avoiding death because various misdeeds of theirs would get found out before they were reembodied, some of them have misdeeds to their name serious enough to not get reembodied at all. The majority of people for whom Mandos possesses backups he has declared unfit to reembody. They're counting on your unwillingness to invite their retaliation when it won't even keep them dead - and I am not telling you this so you'll be inspired to kill them, you were chosen for not being the type, but so you understand that some angry suicide bomber here could upset them enough to escalate, even if they're pretending otherwise. Something will go wrong and they will react wildly out of proportion because they are too powerful and not careful enough and billions of people will die.

If I wanted that outcome I could do it right now; I could put out your sun. I swear again that everything I've said to you is true. I am not at all constrained in my ability to cause havoc, but I am desperately constrained in my ability to prevent it. But you're in a different galaxy, they found you by sheer random chance, one in a billion, they needn't find you again - take the tech and close that door, before disaster comes through it -"

Sure, she was told they could swear to things, but that would be a really useful fiction to sell to a newly found species. "Who mentioned me to you?"

"Listened in on a couple of the prince Nelyafinwë's logistics people. You're not the only person I've spoken to - the only one in Voa, it's riskier here than out in the countries where they've just done drive-by demand letters -"

So it's entirely possible that he's distributed this - offer - so much that she doesn't even meaningfully get to take or leave it. Charming. Fucking aliens. "Listened in on?"

"They told you I tortured people, right? I - I don't actually think it's a lie, to them, they're Elves, ugly buildings are torture and confinement is torture and mediocre singing is torture - what I actually did was figure out how to interact directly with the chips. The Valar have utterly crippling deficits in modeling and understanding normal species. We're billions of years old - started when the universe did - and we don't think like them, at all. I uploaded people and I made copies and I figured out how they work, and now I am capable of carrying on a conversation. If you haven't met one of the other ones you won't appreciate the difference. Anyway, I can read everything they transmit through their chips and they do everything through their chips."

You'd need a god, if only a minor one -

"You've given me a great deal to think about." She is going to get dumplings for lunch, in sour gravy. She missed her granddaughter's party and will have to make it up to her. Those papers will take forever to clean up but she can make her assistant do it while she is eating dumplings in sour gravy.

Melkor scowls, leans forward, brushes her face.

Governor Avalor gets to the office that morning a couple minutes late; the room is empty.

This stack of papers is out of order. She's not going senile, is she? Well. It's only happened the once.

Peka loves Valinor. She poses for pictures and teaches people Tapap songs and dresses herself and Katin in pretty clothes that barely dent her budget and she eats like a princess and she kisses a prince.