"Knew I liked you for a reason. I mean, other than the cute face and fat ass. So, what, you just want me to show up tomorrow?"

"Yes sir, yes sir."

"Sure, fuck it. Why not?"

"Alright! Let's, let's fucking do this! --I think sophomores are coming in now, I'll let Wilbur know you're running."

"Hey Alex."

"Wilbur, hey! Schlatt agreed to run, I thought I'd, y'know, come on over, let you know."

"I thought he was already running...?"

"I mean, basically, just, y'know, running everything by him. I just wanted to check in, you know, we’re still cool, right? It’s just—just friendly competition."

"Yeah, I mean, of course."

"Cool. That’s—that’s really good! Great, yeah."

Wilbur pauses, looks Alex up and down pointedly. "I’d even say it’s been a pleasure, running against you."

Alex laughs and raises one eyebrow. "I’m going to kiss you on the lips right after I completely destroy you in the polls."

"Careful, Alex, I'll hold you to that."

"I hope you do!"

"We should have a debate, y'know, do some campaigning. After dinner?"

"It's a date. --Don't take the soup, I saw a mal near it."

"So gentlemanly! It really is a date."

"Don't get too cocky, Soot."

"Me? Cocky? Never."

"Uh-huh."

"Hey, loverboy! --Not you, babe, I mean Wil. Heard you were running for president or some shit? I'm gonna kick your ass."

"Oh, come on. Are you even coming to the debates or are you just there to be Alex's pretty face?"

"You saying I don't have a pretty enough face on my own? I'm hurt. And here I thought we had something."

"I'm not coming to your pussy-ass debates, loverboy. Fatass here's gonna get me aaaaall the votes, nothing for me to do but show up tomorrow."

Eyeroll. "Sure. You two have fun with that."