Lan Wangji finds his room, carries Wei Ying into it, and puts him down gently on the bed.

O.....kay.

"Thank you Lan Wangji. C'mon, Wei Ying, let's go find your room now."

"Wei Ying stays here."

"If Wei Ying stays here you will both be eaten by mals and die."

"I will kill the mals with my sword."

"If you try that, you will die, and Wei Ying will die."

how is it even possible to be this stupid that's unproductive. They're not going to run out of time before curfew, she built in enough slack that she doesn't have to physically pull Wei Wuxian out of the room yet--

He doubts THAT. His cause is righteous and his heart is pure.

"Okay, a-Zhan, this is very funny but I'm going now and if you try to stop me I'll kick you in the balls."

GOOD. THANK YOU.

Lan Zhan grudgingly accepts the incomprehensible preferences of his ONE TRUE LOVE and FUTURE BETHROTHED.

The door closes. 

"I bet I'm the least obnoxious person to walk back, a-Ko."

"Huaisang was fine! Masozi was also fine except for how he kept stopping in the middle of the hallway to try to think about math problems. --but yes I do expect you'll be easiest, Wei Ying-chan." 

(Is she a little bit testing to see how he feels about being called that? Yes.)

"We're speaking Mandarin, Ayako, calling me Wei Ying-chan just makes you sound like a weeb."

"Maybe I am a weeb. You don't know I'm not. --Also the only other way I have to do diminuitive-but-affectionate friendly nicknames is the a- construction which would be weird because nobody calls you that except your sister."

"You could call me Xianxian! Lots of people call me that! Mostly when I'm in trouble."

"But then I sound like I'm yelling at you and you're in trouble and I want to save that for if it's ever actually true."

"You're going to yell at me? But I make only flawless decisions!"

"I said if, not when! Your decisions are flawless, truly inspirational, a guide to us all, but I can't rely on that staying true forever now can I." 

"But is it more likely that I made a bad decision or that your judgment is impaired?"

"Depends on the decision, I think. And on whether Wen Qing is also yelling at you." 

"Oh, that's true, a-Qing is infallible."

"She is."

"It comes with the doctoring."

"It really does."

Pause.

"...you were right about Wen Ning. You probably know that? But."

"Of course I'm right. I'm always right. What am I right about?"