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There are things Jing Yi expects when he flies through the window to his rooms.
Like his rooms. Like the floor being where he expects. Like all the furniture being out of the way of anyone flying through a window.
He finds none of those things.
There may or may not be a crashing noise. Or a very undignified yelp.
that's a good question
john thought it was normal sex for him to beat me up and pretend to rape me and in case you're wondering that's not normal sex
super fun! but not normal
so if you're like "obviously sex is going to involve balloons or someone wearing a diaper or being hypnotized or being forced to wear lipstick while someone calls me a girl"
you gotta tell me
I can't predict these things
...
To my knowledge sex usually involves, like, kissing and genitals?
I am 99% sure that is totally normal and unsurprising
unless Cascadia is weirder than I thought
right but are you touching genitals gently or kicking people in the balls
gently! what the fuck?
He is going to get a good grade in pretending to be a Gileadite.
what about weird orgasm denial stuff
no having orgasms except with the people you're fucking, no looking at other people and seeing if they're hot
okay so normal sex is when you kiss each other and touch each other all over your bodies in a nice gentle way until you're super worked up and then you rub your dicks against each other or put your mouths on each other's dicks or touch each other's dicks or one of you puts your dick in the other one's ass or put your fingers in each other's assholes or lick each other's assholes
until you both come
and then you cuddle
and you say things during sex but like nice things like "you're so beautiful" and "you make me feel so good" and not things like "you dirty useless cum-eating whore"
also sometimes there are sex toys
if you like any other things you gotta tell me and not spring it on me unexpectedly
or look at me in bafflement when I don't start kicking you and saying "no"
i'm a bad person to do sex negotiation with because I'm up for like anything
except spanking
trauma reasons
also noted!
I think I'm going to end up being the one with boundaries and suchlike.
It's a weird sensation
oh yeah probably everyone in gilead is like "I can't do this! I have to wait until I'm married! pegging isn't sex tho"
Gilead has a terminal lack of imagination
...I am counting myself here, tbh
Look, he's using an internet acronym! He's still got his undercover skills, baby.
you didn't shock me so much as surprise me!
As a firm member of team "we should kiss and maybe keep some of our clothes on, or not, I'm not fussy": it's a wild world out there
it's because I watched too much porn as a kid
permanently turned me into a pervert
and john watched too little porn and he became a pervert
you gotta titrate that shit
By that logic wouldn't I be more like John?
Somehow I encountered the ideal amount of porn under my rock and didn't even notice!
well you probably watched more porn than john
he was like saving himself for me for a decade
he didn't even look at shirtless dudes
Okay, so shirtless people definitely featured and that is probably the explanation
It's honestly not that exciting? Despite being under a rock I eventually found out about Closet, met a few people there
I imagine most people's 'and that's how I lost my virginity!' stories end up pretty similar after a while
... That's at least unique lack of a story!
Much more stylish than "there was a deserted park and a guy I didn't know the name of"
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