"Oh, man, that sucks. That's worse than John's parents. But you're here now! And you have a fabulous fashion sense. How's Cascadia treating you?"

"It's been pretty good. I appreciate the freedom." (Because 'I appreciate the Rectangles' while more true, is just a weird thing to say.)

"You should come over to my place! Movie marathon! Or a documentary marathon. I know some really good documentaries. Say, do you like guys?"

"Sure! And, uh, sure?"

"Great! Do you want to get drunk and let me seduce you? Because I wanted to have a threesome and John is anxious about it and I thought 'oh, another Gileadite, that would be good, I bet he'd be way less scared around someone else with the same background' and also I think Gileadites might just be phenomenal at sex. With all the, like, repression? All the horny just builds up inside you like lava inside a volcano and then when it's unleashed it's like a sex beast. Volcano sex beast. But then I was like 'shit, do Gileadites know how to flirt?' because the only Gileadite I've ever flirted with, like, knocked very politely on my door and said 'if you don't mind I would like to tell you that I've been hopelessly in love with you for a decade and want to have lots of sex and babies' and I can't imagine this is how it normally works. I think you do ask each other out on dates, though, right? At least sometimes? But gay flirting is going to be different than that and I don't know how to do Gileadite gay flirting. And it would be super embarrassing if I got you drunk and crawled into your lap and then it turned out you didn't want to fuck me at all. Incredibly awkward. So I thought I'd ask and then once we were on the same page I could seduce you fine."

His ears are bright pink. 

He is trying not to laugh and not completely succeeding. "If we both end up in the same place drunk and John is cool with it, my lap is available."

"Awesome! How does gay flirting in Gilead work anyway? John doesn't know because he's, like, mesexual which I don't think is even an asexual-spectrum orientation? Demisexual. Very demisexual. Is that even technically gay, like, he's only attracted to a man but I'm pretty sure he'd like me as much if I were a chick, even a regular chick with a vagina and shit. And the only other example I know about is John's brother and I think that's also super weird. Because his best friend went into his office and pointed a gun at him and is like 'I'm going to Japan with a fuckton of state secrets and the fifty million dollars I embezzled, you're coming with me or I'm going to shoot you, btw I murdered my dad' and then kept him prisoner in a hotel room until he decided God doesn't exist and gay sex was fine. And now they're in love and living it up on Ex-Dictator Street and John's brother keeps posting thirst traps on Instagram. I'm pretty sure that's not typical either, because that would be too much embezzlement. It's very romantic though. I wish someone would kidnap me to Japan."

????

???????

So, like, the kidnapping turning out to be more concerning than John made it sound is not surprising, but, uh that is a lot concerning? Also, Japan? Copycat-backwater Japan??? And also people murdering people and then running off with state secrets is still a thing, he should not feel vindicated but he is feeling vindicated.

"I grew up in the middle of nowhere, under a rock," ie one of the largest cities in the world and pinnacle of culture "I honestly have no idea."

"Probably they're all really weird. Every Gileadite I know who has tried to hit on someone has been really weird."

He looks at Jing Yi suspiciously. "...are you going to try to kidnap me because John has dibs. If I'm going to be kidnapped by anyone it's John."

"I wouldn't dare get in the way of you two lovebirds."

(Is that an actual smile? John is actually smiling. Aww, they really are in love.)

Bounce bounce. "Do you like computers? I like computers. I'm working on a startup called Yiling and we're going to revolutionize, uh, some stuff you probably only understand if you're a fucking nerd."

"The rock did not have much computing. I know Wikipedia exists! Such a helpful website."

"Well what do they have on the rock?"

"There wasn't much technology in general, really. It was a pretty quiet rock." Once again he is in too deep. Conversations with these people are cursed.

"Oh, yeah, I heard that happens. Back-to-the-land types. Probably a lot of hiking. Good news, everyone around here fucking loves hiking."

"If I see another forest or mountain, it will be too soon."

"I hear they don't have very many forests in Japan! All skyscrapers and subways and cute girls in ridiculous outfits."

"There are many forests in Japan."

"Not in the parts where your brother is posting horny pictures of himself."

"I mean, Cascadia has also got at least one of those covered."

"Awwww! She's a flirt! She flirts."

"I'm a girl now? No one told me."  Why does this keep happening? Why isn't he bothered?