gay necromancers in the potterverse
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"You mean like hiding in the woods somewhere? I guess if they can hide dragons they can probably hide anything but unless neanderthals are magic I don't know why they would."

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"It'd be really weird if only the nonhumans we didn't have fossils of turned out to still exist."

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"Not necessarily! If a species doesn't exist anymore, there's less to be gained from hiding their fossils, as long as the skeletons aren't obviously magic."

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"Oh my god, Neanderthals could be magic. Do you think there's a book about it?"

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"Maybe! I really want to get a book of all the species that wizards are keeping secret."

The parents have finished changing their money (McGonagall must have talked to Mrs. Irving at some point while Cyrus was busy with magic practice, because she took some out too) and they all get herded towards the robe shop.

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This is the face Cy is going to be making in two months when he discovers that you get to Gringotts vaults via roller coaster.

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"Do you think nonhumans have alien psychologies? --Is that racist? Shit, I don't want to be racist. Speciesist? I don't know how we would know if they do because lots of people historically have written books claiming that different races of humans have psychological differences they totally don't."

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"Maybe we can meet some! Professor, are there any non-human students at Hogwarts?"

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Professor McGonagall looks levelly at her for a moment and says, "Non-humans are not currently permitted by the Wizengamot to carry wands or attend wizarding schools." She definitely doesn't sound disapproving when she says this. She would never disapprove of a government policy, goodness no.

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"That sounds racist. Or speciesist."

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"Some people do think so, yes. The Hogwarts library has a number of books on interspecies relations in Britain and elsewhere." And it's also supposed to be on the History of Magic curriculum, but the combination of tenure and the ethereal retribution she would face if she brought an exorcist anywhere near Hogwarts make that rather irrelevant, don't they.

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"Okay but those books are probably written by racists."

Cy wishes he had put more thought into how he would have figured out that scientific racism was wrong if he were born in the 19th century. Last time he read about Galton he had been distracted by the concept of reaction times correlating with IQ and had spent the next ten days randomly terrifying people to see how smart they were. 

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She can't introduce him to the kitchen elves; for all that they're very orderly and sensible beings in themselves they're unfortunately easy to turn into a force multiplier for havoc, as the Spaghetti Incident of the past spring demonstrated quite vividly.

"I can recommend you books with a wide range of perspectives, including some written by non-humans themselves." By which she means goblins and merpeople--giants don't write anything down, centaurs don't talk to humans if they can avoid it, and if house-elves write books they keep them as secret as most other facts about themselves.

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Cy is going to FIND SOME NONHUMANS and TALK TO THEM and IF NECESSARY RESCUE THEM FROM RACISTS AND BRING THEM TO A ZOMBIE MOUNTAIN TO LIVE AND GROW POTATOES. But not radishes. Radishes are gross.

He is immediately distracted from his new life plan by the existence of Gambol and Japes' Wizarding Joke Shop, which proudly advertised its stock of Dungbombs and Dr. Filibuster's Fabulous Wet-Start No-Heat Fireworks. "Hermione there's a joke shop!"

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"Huh. I wonder if 'no heat' means you can't injure yourself setting them off or if . . ." And he can't hear the rest of the sentence because Hermione has moved to the other side of the group so she can stare through a bookstore window like she's waiting for her husband to return from the war.

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Oh, that's even more important than whatever a Dungbomb is.

Cy has joined her. "Hermione, Hermione, I want all of them. Can we have all of them."

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Hermione turns to look at her parents. Her father smiles warmly and says, "I don't think we can carry all of them, but we can certainly try."

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"And books will be the last but one stop on our route for exactly that reason. Also, a great many of those books are already in our library; I will help you identify those that are not." And here is Madam Malkin's Robes For All Occasions.

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But if they're in the library Cyrus will read them later! Cyrus wants to read them now!

Cyrus will go get robes even though he feels weird about wearing a dress.

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Madam Malkin's contains two young women, a young man, and an authoritative-looking middle-aged woman who can be assumed to be Madam Malkin. It also contains a white-blond boy being measured by an animated tape measure who nods to the four new arrivals as they get set up with their own tape measures. 

"Hello. You for Hogwarts too?"

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"Yeah! I'm Cy Wei. You?"

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"Draco Malfoy. And between your clothes and your not knowing that, you must be the . . . new kids. I'll help you out: my father is Lucius Malfoy; he's on the Hogwarts Board and has the ear of Minister Jin."

Justin Finch-Fletchley looks at the rest of the group with an expression of embarrassed compassion, as though inviting them all to pity Draco for his tragic case of gauche-osis.

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"Oh!" Cy says brightly. "My father is Robert Wei, and he's on the Big Rock Candy Mountain Board and has the ear of the Tooth Fairy."

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"You're just making things up," says Draco disgustedly. "Typical muggleborn. Doesn't know anything and doesn't care."

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"Hey!"

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