:Fire:, she says, somewhat idiotically, pointing.

Ma'ar is still a long way from fully awake, but he rolls blearily toward the side of the blanket that's on fire, and manages to slap an impermeable mage-barrier over it, depriving the flames of air. They quickly die out. 

He slumps down again, breathing hard. 

She can't quite think what to say or do. She stands there, a bit stupidly. Puts the gun away, eventually.

Ma'ar eventually rolls over and tucks his head under the blanket, but it does not seem like he's going to get back to sleep again anytime soon. 

He sighs heavily and sits up, rubbing his forehead. :I - gods - I am sorry about that...: 

She doesn't quite know what to make of that. :I don't think it caused any problems? I can mend the blanket...:

:Thank you: Ma'ar starts folding it to pass to her, and then stops halfway, one hand loosely clenched over a bunched-up wad of cloth. His eyes are still fixed in the distance, not really focusing. 

:Are you...all right?:

:- Not - especially...: 

He doesn't say anything else. 

:Do you ...need anything?:

:...Maybe. Probably: Ma'ar lets his head fall back, neck loose. :Not - sure - what would help. I - this does not happen very often, anymore: 

:I don't really know what ...helps people. Mhalir used to wish he was a baby bird.: She has no idea how that'd help.

It startles a bitter half-chuckle out of him. :Huh. Really: 

A long pause. 

:...I think I would like a hug. Please: 

- well, that seems both doable and hard to do too badly. She hugs him. 

Ma'ar shivers and leans against her. He takes a ragged breath - and then is suddenly sobbing, just as unexpected to himself as it presumably is to her. 

She feels very out of her depth! Presumably this is not because she messed up the hug. She's not sure you can mess up at hugs.

Ma'ar is also feeling out of his depth, in a very different way. He's so confused about it. 

:...Sorry: he manages eventually. :Not sure why I - am doing this - I do not normally - get this upset when I am alone...: 

...does that mean that it is something she's doing? Probably if he knew what he could just request she not do it? 

She continues hugging him but with more self-doubt.

Ma'ar spends a while poking at the confusing part. 

:...I think I - feel safe with you: he muses. :And - like you understand - and so it is more tempting to bother having emotions and seeking reassurance about them. Maybe. I am not sure if that is what is happening: 

Carissa is not sure she's ever in her life been in a position where she trusted someone enough it was tempting to have emotions, as opposed to the emotions just rudely showing up against her better judgment in the lucky presence of versions of Mhalir who are too nice to hold that against people. But it doesn't seem totally impossible as a concept? She can't hurt Ma'ar and she isn't going to give up on being allied with him and their relationship is set by whatever he thinks makes the best ally of her and - maybe that's a kind of safety that makes it make sense to do things that wouldn't make any sense otherwise, at all. 

Ma'ar has his Thoughtsensing open enough to pick up on the edges of that, though he's very distracted. ...Something about her framing bothers him, but it's hardly the first time that has happened, and he's not sure it's ever productive to delve into that, much less when he's too emotional to speak in coherent sentences. 

(And there is a yawning pit of– NO he is NOT looking at that right now - 

:- I wish I could love you the way Leareth loves his Carissa: 

(...What. Ma'ar did not consciously mean to say that at all.) 

 - ow? 

She is not going to burst into tears too, she is not safe the way he is and she's not going to be stupid -

Ma'ar is pretty sure that he's saying or doing something hurtful, somehow, right now, but that noticing is a distant sidenote. 

:...In the nightmare I just had: he pushes out, :I - I killed - their daughter...: 

Carissa does not really know how to be reassuring about that. :That seems not very likely. And also fixable.:

Ma'ar hesitates for a long time. 

:It was - not random: he manages finally. :It was - Leareth's, my, immortality method - 

- it relies on - taking over the bodies of our blood descendants. And...killing them, in the process, usually... That is what I had done. In the dream: 

She processes that, for a second. 

:So if you die here you'll - come back as - one of your children??: