"I'm sorry."

Akira's head snaps back around to stare at Yutaka. "The fuck are you apologising for?"

"I don't know, just... I don't want to sound too full of myself—"

"Few years too late for that," he mutters.

"—but I was kind of drawing the fire off you while I was there, wasn't I?" he continues, pretending he didn't hear that.

"Ah. So you knew."

He shrugs and takes another drag of the cigarette then breathes it out. "You were my first kiss, you know?"

"—I was????"

"I guess there were some pecks on the lips here and there. There was Kazumi..."

He scoffs. "Did you actually think you were straight back then?"

"I was eleven and I wanted to be what my father wanted me to be, I didn't know—didn't want to know anything that would make that harder."

Here are their drinks and miso soup.

Thank you kindly.

"But you were my first real kiss."

"...you were all talk, huh."

"I've always been all talk."

"That's not true."

He shrugs and takes another drag of his cigarette.

"...well. Same here. Obviously." Pause. "Was I also your first, uh..."

"No. That was Miki."

"Ugh. That jackass."

"It wasn't very good, we were both pretending we weren't each other's firsts and we were too dumb to admit that we didn't know what we were doing and porn does not prepare you for that stuff."

"Yeah, that sounds like you." He lifts his soup bowl to his lips and starts blowing on it.

"It does, doesn't it."

"Yeah. You were my first—that, too, though. Which you knew."

"I knew," he agrees. "Man, we've been friends forever, huh?"