no arcane mark, illegal to distribute, circulating underground in cafes
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The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. I am the Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado, a Delegate to the Constitutional Convention. All men should Learn from my Wise Example.

Delegatio. We are Delegates to the Constitutional Convention. Today we shall debate a law about Freedom of the Pen. 

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. This law is Bad, because although it bans Many Books, it still allows my subjects to proselytize for Anarchic Powers. 

Delegatio. Anarchic Powers? You wish to ban Desna, goddess of Safe Travel?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). In Truth, I Do, for the blessings of Desna allow men to Depart my County when they ought remain Beneath me. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Desna is a Holy Goddess, who protects Travelers from Harm. I meant Other Anarchic Powers.

Delegatio. You wish to ban Milani, goddess of Fighting Tyranny?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). In Truth, I Do, for the blessings of Milani allow men to Rise Up against Wicked Tyrants. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Milani is a Holy Goddess, who has Liberated us from Asmodeus. I meant Other Anarchic Powers.

Delegatio. You wish to ban Chaldira, goddess of Slips?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). In Truth, I Do, for the blessings of Chaldira allow Slips to seek their Freedom. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Chaldira is a Holy Goddess, who protects Slips from Asmodean Slavers.

Delegatio. You wish to ban Gorum, god of Soldiers?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). I truly do Not, for I have many Soldiers of my Own. However I had Forgotten that Gorum was an Anarchic Power. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Gorum is a Holy God, whose soldiers are Valiant Warriors for the cause of Good.

Delegatio. You wish to ban Cayden, god of Revelry?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). In Truth, I Do, for the blessings of Cayden allow men the Pleasure of Drink, and I believe there should be no Pleasures in life apart from Obedience to Me. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Cayden is a Holy God, who brings men Joy even in times of Great Strife.

Delegatio. You wish to ban Calistria, goddess of Whorehouses?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado (aside). In Truth, I Do, for even the Whores will not have me, and therefore I wish all men to be Celibate as Paladins. But I cannot say that.

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. Of course not, for Calistria is a Holy Goddess, and I would Never say otherwise where her Priests can Hear Me.

Delegatio. Those are all the Anarchic Powers which have been Invited to this Convention. Tell me, which Anarchic Powers should men be Prohibited from Speaking For?

The Most Wise and Honorable Count Avocado. There are many Wicked anarchic powers, which should be Banned. For example Men should not be allowed to advocate for the release of Rovagug.

Delegatio. That is already illegal.

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Someone working for her manages to get a copy of this one. However she's not going to waste her time and spells trying to find the writer, because 1) Cyprian and Marusek and their respective staffs are both wildly better priorities for her spells right now than random Chelish censorship-defiers and 2) it's pretty funny. 

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That's probably a little unfair.

Stick it in the very important 'illegal pamphlets, access only for matters of importance' cabinet. Which is in an unsupervised room. With a thick door that makes it hard to hear laughter through it. Unlocked.

This Thread Is On Hiatus
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