"If I told anyone my name? Yes. Yes I would be. Let's not do that - mortals can learn magic, can I learn how to make gates or tears and just do it myself?"

"Well, yes, but maybe not before you starve to death."

".... Is there any way, any way at all, that I can find food to eat here that does not belong to anyone?"

"In a word, no. You might be able to find food that no one is paying enough attention to to use to claim you, but there's no good way to be sure."

"Not even if I took up - I don't know, farming?"

"The seeds would come from somewhere - unless you have them in you pocket? - the land would have claims on it, the rain would happen somehow. This place is lousy with magic. Somebody will be able to claim some responsibility for anything you eat if you didn't bring it along."

"That's - extremely upsetting, how in the world does anyone manage to avoid getting claimed at all without outside sources?"

"Fairies have the food thing easier than mortals do. We can still be vassalized with food, but not nearly as easily - well, if you'd brought mortal food and I ate it, you'd have me, but within our realm. Usually it's debt or losing a game or being cornered into giving up our names."

"I'm genuinely happy for you," says Ted, sincerely. "But I'm still really annoyed at the inconsistencies of the universe, this is feeling like it's out to get me. You would not have this problem in the 'mortal' world."

"Wouldn't I? If I went to the mortal world what are you imagining I'd eat?"

"The - wait, are you still forced to follow the vassal thing even in another world? Ours, you can feed people whatever you want by hand and tell people your name all day long and there's no - vassal system. For mortals, certainly."

"Mortals can't vassalize each other at all, as I understand it, yes, but I am not a mortal."

"But are you sure it's your status as an immortal that's doing it, or the fact that you are in this world?"

"I wouldn't really care to test it," she points out. "But I believe any pair of people including at least one fairy can under the right circumstances follow a vassal/master relationship."

"I - hadn't meant to imply that you should test it, sorry, I'm just - trying to understand the rules at play here."

"As far as I know, mortal-and-mortal interactions are exceptional in not having the possibility of somebody winding up at somebody else's beck and call."

"Yeah, it's kind of great."

"But is it possible that it can happen here?"

"You already know each other's names, right?" says Promise. "If it could happen between mortals here then you'd be vassals to each other. Try it if you like."

He looks at Fred. "Scratch your nose," he says.

"Nnnnope," says Fred. "On one hand, yay, on the other hand, damn."

"It doesn't technically belong to you?"