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Here is a demon. The demon is in his swimming pool.
He doesn't swim naked, so he takes the summon anyway.
demon cam vs the clam planet
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from_scratch
from_scratch
Cam glances at it, makes an electronic copy for his computer to process, reads over the translation, and makes the things.
Now they are supplied with food, books, a standard shipping container filled entirely with someone's favourite brand of pillow without which they cannot sleep at night, reputable wilderness survival kits, and other miscellaneous useful and non-weaponlike items.
"Thank you!" says Tyastir.
"I hope you haven't befouled us all and doomed us to the torment of the filth contagion!" says Soto. "But apart from that, you've been very helpful."
"Thank you!" says Tyastir.
"I hope you haven't befouled us all and doomed us to the torment of the filth contagion!" says Soto. "But apart from that, you've been very helpful."
from_scratch
"Well, one does what one can. I will hopefully be back with similar batches of evacuees from other planets. Please don't start murdering each other if one of you accomplishes something."
"I'd hope we'd all have more sense than that," says Soto.
"Don't be silly, you're far too cynical to hope," says Tyastir.
"True," says Soto.
"Don't be silly, you're far too cynical to hope," says Tyastir.
"True," says Soto.
from_scratch
"I hope you have more sense than that too. Bye," says Cam, and he's off to another planet which is probably having a civil war.
The first other planet he tries has actually already stopped having its civil war, on account of someone managed to replicate the black hole trick.
Civil war! The responses to the end of the world here are approximately in line with what was happening on Soto and Tyastir's planet, but there are fewer people having productive discussions and more people defending the rollercoaster rides and romantic dinners from the rioters and omnicidal fanatics.
from_scratch
That's good of them. Cam... does not think he can productively assist. Do they have any black hole equipment here that he can wreck?
No. There are multiple competing theories about how the other planets managed the black hole trick in the first place, and much to some people's disgust, this planet doesn't have the facilities to pull off three of them and someone has already wrecked the particle accelerator that would be necessary to try either of the other two.
More civil war! On this planet, the "everyone please shut up and let us think" faction is actually winning, partly by loudly reminding everyone else that they are a galactically renowned centre of culture and learning and all this violence is beneath them.
from_scratch
Oh good! Does he dare contact them... hmmm...
...yeah. He finds where whoever's leading the faction is and drops a comm.
"Hello."
...yeah. He finds where whoever's leading the faction is and drops a comm.
"Hello."
"What?"
"Who's that?"
"It's the filth!"
"Well, tell it to stop ending the world!"
"I don't think it's going to listen!"
"Who's that?"
"It's the filth!"
"Well, tell it to stop ending the world!"
"I don't think it's going to listen!"
from_scratch
"I'm not setting out to end the world," Cam says. "If there's something more specific you'd like me to do we can discuss that."
"Where's that Earth refugee who was studying filth? Someone find the filth student!"
"I think they went to the bathroom..."
"There's a joke in there somewhere."
"Now is not the time, Pyeki."
"I think they went to the bathroom..."
"There's a joke in there somewhere."
"Now is not the time, Pyeki."
from_scratch
"I would love to talk to the Earth refugee who may know more than zero things about the subject," says Cam.
"Well, you'll have to wait twenty minutes," says Pyeki.
"That was a joke. That person was joking," someone else clarifies.
"That was a joke. That person was joking," someone else clarifies.
from_scratch
"Well, I'll wait whatever amount of time it actually takes your species to go to the bathroom."
"Fine. Someone please tell me how many planets are still responding," says an administrative type. Someone else starts reading off a list of planets and how recently they have been heard from via FTL communication. It's not looking good overall.
The filth student emerges from the bathroom. "Hey, whatever your name is! We need your expertise!" says Pyeki.
"What?"
"The destroyer of worlds wants to talk to you!"
"What?"
The filth student emerges from the bathroom. "Hey, whatever your name is! We need your expertise!" says Pyeki.
"What?"
"The destroyer of worlds wants to talk to you!"
"What?"
from_scratch
"Hello!" says Cam. "I really am not destroying these worlds! They destroy themselves and it's actually pissing me off very badly!"
"Are you... are you from the maze?" asks the filth student.
from_scratch
"No. I'm from somewhere else. But I came through the maze to get here and I'm working with the maze people."
"I'm - I'm not prepared for this!" says the filth student, agitated. "We don't know how much contact is required for the contagion to spread! I don't want to talk to you and then spend the rest of my life in quarantine!"
"If that's all it takes..." says the administrative type, glancing uneasily at the comm.
"We don't know!"
"Perhaps we should refuse to speak to the filth until we can find a volunteer."
"If that's all it takes..." says the administrative type, glancing uneasily at the comm.
"We don't know!"
"Perhaps we should refuse to speak to the filth until we can find a volunteer."
from_scratch
"That's all right too but I must insist that you refrain from murdering anyone for having interacted with me even if they do sprout wings."