Gloria in the Potterverse
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"They do!"

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Ron laughs. "Do you think you'd be a cat?"

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"I don't know what determines what you get!"

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"No one does but people aren't really surprised by what they get, they're always like 'oh it makes total sense'."

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"I wouldn't be shocked to be a cat. I wouldn't be shocked to be lots of things, though."

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"I could see myself as a bird. Or something small. Or something with lots of energy. Or something smart."

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"I think cat or bird or snake is likeliest for me."

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"I don't know what I'd be. Why snake?"

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"Snakes just seem to really like me! One time I accidentally freed a giant boa constrictor from the zoo."

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"Wow. Um, why?"

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"Prats kept rapping on its enclosure and demanding it do things for their entertainment."

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"...why? That's stupid."

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"I don't know why. Apparently it's not interesting enough when its just minding its own business."

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"...I'm really happy I wasn't there. Animals hate me."

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"I don't know! They just do. Even goldfish."

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"Goldfish can hate people?"

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"You wouldn't think so and yet mine hid when I fed it and tried to commit suicide three times."

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"Tried to commit suicide?"

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"Jumped out of the fishbowl."

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"Wow. Poor thing."

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"After the second time we put a lid on the bowl but it tried again while I was feeding it. So I threw it in a river."

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"It's probably been eaten by something by now."

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