Tabitha-No-Last-Name, young vampiress, is hungry. Not for blood, she ate a deer that morning, but rather for more conventional fare. So, she has picked a house without a decent home security system, and is now rummaging around their fridge. Upon finding some raspberry jam, bread, and margarine, she sets about making herself a sandwich.
Stiles is not having a great night. He's actually having a bad year, maybe a bad decade, but especially a bad night
It's not even surprising that he wakes up. He's less sure about the sounds downstairs.
He investigates, sneaking down the stairs so stealthily. He's like a cat, or a ninja. A ninja cat. He doesn't think anyone would train a cat as a ninja but that would be pretty cool.
He tries to get a good look at the intruder.
"Why are you in my house? That's rude! Is that a good sandwich?"
"Why are you doing illegal things? You might get caught and then they won't let you eat sandwiches."
"Eating people is rude too! Why aren't you wearing any pants?"
"It's rude not to! Why don't you know normal things, everyone knows about pants."
"Why would you get blood on your clothes? Are you a cop? Or a murderer?"
He stares for a few seconds.
"What else can you do? Can you fly? Are you super strong? Do you drink blood? Is that a blood sandwich?"
"I don't know vampires besides in the stories. Vampires sound cool, why isn't everyone a vampire? Can you not make other people vampires?"
"Why do you eat people though, can't you just steal blood?"
"That's good, eating people is rude. Maybe you can stop doing it all the time? I can try to get you more blood."