There's a lot of love and confidence and care to go around.

That's really good because it helps him feel really good. And that's helping with whatever he's feeling, which is quite a bit of unease and confusion and feeling somewhat untethered and stuff. But Rosy is like, a good thing (person!!) to cling to when he's feeling like this. And her emotions and how she expresses them and stuff really helps. 

She's pretty happy to just keep holding him until he reaches equilibrium and/or wants to do something else. (Like celebrate—okay probably he will not want that right now.)

Celebrate is probably not achievable at the moment, but equilibrium (for the most part) probably is.

When he is at equilibrium (well, more or less, but he doesn't want to leave Rosy waiting too long probably), he asks, "okay, so, what now, then? We could... do what Callisto was suggesting, I guess? Or at least a little bit?" He's not really up for it, at the moment, but maybe he will be if they start? And he does like kissing her. And doing other things with her. (Lots of fun things have been done with her and will be done.) 

She peers at him with mild suspicion.

He sighs. (She's annoyed at him (okay not annoyed, worried or something apparently, but still) for doing that thing again isn't she. How does she keep being so perceptive?) "Okay, I might not be feeling it at the moment? And if we try maybe things will, um" be less awkward "feel a little better or something? I um, I might like doing that sort of thing? Maybe? And want to be doing it now even if it's hard?" Why do all of his words sound so foolish when they come out of his mouth. 

"Well, all right. Far be it from me to object to celebrations." She kisses him on the cheek.

(Now just to figure out how to get in the proper mood.) He grins at her kiss, smiles, and tries kissing her back. He presses his lips softly into hers and tries and thinks of the things they're going to do together. (They are really hot things. He's not quite feeling it yet, but he will, right?) 

His terribly devious girlfriend takes advantage of his distraction to give him an adorable cozy nuzzle.

He grins appreciatively at her at the nuzzle (though his actually feelings are slightly more complicated but he does like the way she loves him) and tries kissing her again, a little harder this time. It still doesn't feel right. (Why doesn't it? He just wants all these weird feelings to go away!) 

"...turmoil, my love?"

Fucking hell! He bites his lip in frustration. "It's not really anything to worry about," he tries. And then he tries to shove all the turmoil out of his mind and tries to go in for a better kiss this time. 

His Rosy is difficult to kiss on account of all the Concern.

Why is she doing that instead of like, letting herself be kissed? (He gets it, she's worried about him, but he wants the worries to go away and he wants Rosy to be hot again.) He growls with frustration and tries to kiss her harder and better. 

"—John—um—"

Fucking hell! "What?!" he half-snarls. And then realizes his mistake, and blanches, and pulls back. "Shit, sorry," he says, feeling embarrassed and stupid and various other things (some of which are annoyance that if she's supposed to be his she shouldn't be able to say no like that... but those thoughts are shoved aside as best he can. He still wishes he could just make her be hot at him the way she's supposed be, but he wouldn't ever do something like that to her). "Sorry! Fuck, I just... sorry. Sorry." 

It's surprisingly scary, and not in a good way, to see John being angry with her for not being sexually available enough. As an in-the-moment experience it is really quite pressing. She turns the feeling over thoughtfully in her mind.

"...we might have some stuff to work through, here," she says slowly.

John doesn't particularly want to be working through anything at the moment, but also he did something really awful and terrible and needs to make up for it. (What was he thinking??) He flops, frustrated and mad at himself, on the bed, and says (possibly a little grumpily), "That makes sense, yeah." (He shouldn't be grumpy though! He should be contrite.) "Sorry," he adds. 

"...are you okay?"

John is a lot of feelings at the moment, and "okay" is not one of them. For a moment he considers telling her so anyways in the interest of polite conversation and moving things along, but just before he does, he realizes she'll probably see right through him. Again. "Not really," he admits. 

She hugs him.

"I'm not sure how to articulate my problems," she admits. "Do you want to try to articulate yours?"

"I mean, I did something really awful" tried to force her to do things she didn't want to do (and it wasn't even hot which feels like such a waste or something) "and then snapped at you about it for some reason when you pushed back. I don't know what I was thinking, sorry." 

"That makes sense." She hugs him some more. "I... think we should find out what you were thinking. I think it's probably important to know that."

He doesn't want to talk about what he was thinking. What he was thinking was bad and wrong. "I was, um, trying to recapture a better mood from earlier?" he says, since that part is true and while still bad feels a lot more like thoughts that he should have been having (how does he keep making foolish mistakes like this though?). "I was trying to figure out how to get back to the better ways we can be so things could be better." Well that sounds kind of dumb doesn't it? Ugh. 

"...do you think maybe you could... ask for my help with that, instead of trying to force me into it? And pull back and reevaluate when things aren't working right, instead of, um, trying to force me into it?"