"Novate? -Estel! I wondered when you'd be back for your new armor. It's long done, and very fine."

"I'm sure it is, Artorak; you never do less. But before I take it, there are things I need to tell you."

"Oh?"

(The only other Signifer in the Pike who has vicarius plate is the paravicar himself. And Estel's in leathers instead. He has a sense he's about to learn why.)

"I'm deserting. Arguably I deserted three months ago. I'm going to call it 'resigning' and offer a final report, but I'm walking in with my old armor in a traveling bag and teleport prepared, and if they try to hold me for court-martial I will flee."

"Ah. You're staying north."

"Yes. I still want the armor, I think it's different enough not to be a betrayal of heraldry or abuse of reputation to wear it, but if you want to charge me more or refuse... that's your right."

"Are you bringing Law to the barbarians?"

"I lost my Law the minute I realized I was stalling on purpose. But I'm certainly reducing Chaos."

"And your mask?"

She showed him. What was once blank and faceless, meant to be indistinguishable from any other Signifer, now had eyeholes carved out to the edges, and colored designs marring the blank white surface.

He nodded, "Unsignified you are, then."

He ducked behind the counter and lifted a carefully-wrapped bundle.

"It's yours, Estel. No extra charge. May order and civilization go with you."

She took it from him, and slid it into her haversack. "And may they stay by your side, Art. Thank you."

And with a final nod, she left.

The next part was the hardest. She changed into the new armor - wonderfully light - and approached Citadel Ordeial, invisible until she reached the gate and knocked.

"Estel, here to give a final report", she said when challenged.

The paravicar wasn't present, for which she was thankful; deciding whether to anticipate counterspelling was the one part of her plan which could be seriously derailed. The confusion of the armigers and novates, the evident disgust of the lictor and paralictors - these she was braced for.

They decided to save face and 'accept her resignation', so she delivered a report to a paralictor and a clerk, both of whom she'd barely met. What worked, what had been achieved, what looked likely to be achieved in the near future. The strange dynamics of logistics in the land of giants. Strong recommendation of recruiting experienced hunters and trackers for Worldwound defenses. Notes on how quickly the demons reacted to a border being covered by humans rather than exclusively by Baba Yaga's constructs, and on how the constructs reacted to ostensible allies.

She was at no point unscrutinized. But also at no point was she in an antimagic field or dimensionally anchored, so she was capable of teleporting out - probably without even a spell, if she used that transportation knack that she and many other conjurers picked up - and so she accepted the scrutiny. It was temporary, she was going to leave, and frankly she deserved it.

Ultimately, she left on her own feet. "Discharged, without record", was the closest she got to an explicit answer of how they regarded her. This was, again, acceptable and probably deserved.

Next - Remesiana. The Palatí family townhouse. The place she grew up, and where she expected to be buried. Her no-longer-home.

She let herself in, and had a servant point her to her parents. Just finished with dinner, apparently.

"Estel! What a surprise! Sit, sit!"

She didn't.

"Mother. Father. The Order will tell you soon, but you deserve to hear it from me."

"I've broken my oath to the Order. Technically I resigned and gave a final report, but I expect to be on the roll of the renounced. I'm going back north, which isn't against orders only in the sense that I did not return to receive orders because they might oblige me to stay south."

"I have dishonored the family name and I don't even regret it. I'm proud of what we're doing there. I expect you'll disown me and I'm planning not to use our name until I hear whether you have." Not that that's hard, the Exiles barely even know she has a surname, but it feels important.

Her parents looked stunned. "Why?", Father managed.

"I found - a cause I believe in more than the Order's. Pushing back the Abyss, bringing steel to the hands and the hearts of the Kellids. And a woman I love and a man we both trust with our lives, and a hundred shouting berserkers beside us in squads just like I taught them. And if Rovagug Itself burst free I'd have her at my side and him at my back and I'd die well and in good company."

Her mother's face had softened. Her father just looked confused.

"I love you both very much. I'll try to visit. Give my love to the rest of the family, if you think they want to hear it. Goodbye."

Her father nodded, and her mother looked about to cry.

She left quickly - she didn't think she was about to follow her mother's example, but she didn't really want to find out.

She teleported back to Caliphas - she'd gotten a room at an inn for two days, since she couldn't quite make it from Kellis to Cheliax in one teleport.