"There's afterlives, but people - don't really like giving up their lives and everyone they know, even aside from the Evil ones. And you only get one mortal life."

Pause. "And the pain."

"The pain?" 

"People dislike dying because it hurts."

"Oh. Yeah, though I would expect that to be less of a consideration than the other. Like, life-light doesn't make pain not, and there are people who participate in consensual games of Murder Tag for fun, where I'm from. Are you sure you don't want a hug?"

"Sure."

He'll accept a hug now. And pet his wolf.

HUG. 

She is really good at hugs. 

And also really glad Sarenrae pointed her at this man. 

And then Lastwall will bring someone who can cast spells, a fresh-faced halfling cleric of Iomedae who looks completely useless in a fight under any and all circumstances, much good that does those people who have to fight her...

Aura Sight sees a wolf with more life energy than usual, a CHAOTIC GOOD!!! person, and a lawful evil person. Detect Undead suggests a lingering aura of undead no longer present clinging to the lawful evil person. Detect Magic says the lawful evil person has a legendary adventurer's magic items and the CHAOTIC GOOD!!! person has a magic dress that might be a minor artifact. Augury thinks inviting them inside is a great idea.

"Hello! I'm Lieutenant Elma of the Ninth Tower. I'm here to take you to the right person to talk to?"

(They are still hugging. She is only mildly surprised.)

"Hi! I'm Lucy Whitman, the Light-Hearted Wastelander, and this is Count Ristomaur Tiriac." 

Tiriac will stop hugging her to bow. "We have urgent news for the Lord Watcher, of the highest priority."

"Yes, come with me if you don't mind -"

And she'll smile at Lucy as they hurry into the city and say "So I'm sure someone's told you you're very Chaotic Good -"

“The chaos part isn’t ideological, I’m just bad at keeping organized.”

"Yes, that's one of the trickier bits, isn't it," she says, doing her best to keep up a constant stream of chatter while Lastwall moves the two directly ideologically-opposed adventurers (and their animal companion) into somewhere with Private Sanctum wards up.

Lucy has plenty of things to chatter about.

She glances idly at the wards as they go through them, noting their existence without especial concern.

" - So I assume you know your companion is Lawful Evil?" she'll say once they're unscryable.

“Oh. Yeah, he used to be a vampire.”

"That was one of the things we wanted to talk to you about, as it happened."

"- We'd very much like to know how this happened," she says apologetically. "You can speak freely - my supervisor will be here in a moment but everything will be passed on anyway -"

Ristomaur will glance at Lucy to determine whether she wants him to translate for her or if she wants to try to explain in her own terms.

“He thinks it’s useful to model me as a demigoddess. I’m from really, really far away, and we don’t have entities that can give our cleric spells, but we do have beings who are really really powerful and my father is one. I’m a quarter star and I can give off light that’s, uh, more broadly life-giving than positive energy seems to be. Also my true form is made of diamond and my healing works on myself. I want to fight, like, all the necromancers in Ustalav, and also Asmodeus, but I also want to not permanently die of being an idiot.”

"- She can cause any undead to return to life instantly and says she can mass-produce diamonds."

"Do you mind if I get a specialist in to cast Greater Dispel Magic and then cast Zone of Truth on you before going further with this?"

“I can demonstrate the diamond thing right now if you want, but go ahead.”

She goes to get one!

The mage is going to try Arcane Sight (confirms they have magic items, confirms they are all very standard except Lucy's dress which is nonsense), try to dispel the false auras on them (fail to find), and then Zone of Truth (which they can resist, but are politely asked not to).

" - Sorry, can you repeat that?"

She repeats herself exactly, down to being able to demonstrate the diamonds thing right now. 

So does he!

"And I'd like an Atonement spell when practical, please. Neutral Good."