i never thought of walruses as being 'cute' exactly.  anyway what the fuck is that thing

now you just need to find a fairy and we can answer the age old question of which is more surprising.

#ancient fucking memes #whatever the fuck this is

awwwwww so cute!!!  what is he? :o

guys............... its obviously shopped ¬.¬

awwwwww so cute!!!  what is he? :o

he's a baby walrus!

But seriously which esper made that because it's super cool. Stealth marketing working on me smdh

[Image description: the walrus-like creature is sitting at a low table, eating Oreos off a plastic plate from a children's tea set. Also at the table are a stuffed teddy bear and a stuffed kangaroo, both with their own plates and teacups. A child's hand is visible in the corner of the photograph.]

I wasn't sure what he's supposed to eat but he likes oreos!

[Image description: the walrus-like creature is poking its head and flippers out of an overturned paper grocery bag, sniffing the air.]

it's just like a cat :3

That's a dungeon critter you've got there, like mine! Mine likes the same things as normal cats but also human food - it can vary depending on the monster. There's actually a program that can get your friend there seen by a specialist in monsters, no charge, and they'll figure out stuff like whether it wants an Oreo and fish diet or if you should be giving kibble or what, and any surprises or powers it might have. Can I come by and get it packed up for you? What’s its name?

awww, what a cute kitty! I don't want to impose on you when I'm sure you've got bigger problems on your plate, but you can bring him in for a checkup once they've got the cars off the road. his name is Raspberry (we let the kids pick)

I can actually come by sooner than that! Can I have the address?

Private Message to Traceless:

we're at 702 s 30th street

will he be back by saturday? maritza has a playdate with her bff and she wants to show him off

I can make a note that it’s time sensitive

I’m outside, can you let me in? Hands are full

I can actually come by sooner than that! Can I have the address?

wow, creepy and pushy much? they just said, once the cars are off the road. if you think it's not worth waiting for some reason, explain why, don't just be like "I'm an esper I'm so trustworthy tell me where you live so I can supervise your new pet."

We've switched to DMs but if you're ever concerned about the public conduct of an esper step one should be to contact their agent! Mine's Paula Bescond. That’ll let you distinguish between cases where something is wrong and someone needs help vs. ones where it’s fine and just looks odd for some reason. (And if you have any complaints about the agent, those’d go to the relevant agency higher ups or appropriate regulatory body.) In this case: I’m not just a random esper, I’m a monster specialist. You can look me up.

"Maritza! Can you get the door for the nice esper?"

 "Mama! You didn't say the magic word!"

The subsequent sigh is not actually audible on the other side of the doorway. "Maritza, can you please get the door?"

 "I can!" Giggle.

There's a few second's pause. "...Please get the door for the nice esper."

 "Okay!"

 There's the sound of footsteps padding across a hardwood floor, and then the door opens on a child who looks to be in elementary school. She smiles up at him. "Hi! Are you the esper that's taking Raspberry on vacation?"

"Yup! I got a super cozy carrier, it's the same brand my kitty likes!" He hefts it. "Where's Raspberry?"

 "He's having a sleepover with Bunbun in the basement!" Giggle. "May I see your kitty cat?"

"He’s all the way in Canada but once Raspberry is packed up I have so many pictures. Where do I find the basement?"

 "This way!" She starts padding towards the stairs. "Guess what kind of animal Bunbun is!"

"A bunny?"

 She bursts out into peals of laughter. "Nope! She's a kangaroo!"

There's a baby gate at the top of the stairs; Maritza ignores the lock entirely and clambers over it.

That makes it awkward to get down the stairs first but he's going to look for an opening at the bottom of the steps.

 "No cutting on the stairs," she tells him solemnly as he passes her. "It's not safe."

The walrus-monster is lying on a cat bed, with a beach towel draped over his body, though it doesn't actually seem to be awake. A stuffed kangaroo is positioned next to him, half-covered with a dish cloth. From the next room over, the same adult voice as before calls, "Maritza, please be nice to the esper!"

"She's fine!" he calls.

This should not be hard. He goes right up to the monster and scoops it and puts it in the carrier and clicks it shut.