"Yeah, terrible oversight, um." He walks to his room and returns with three stakes, a plastic bottle of water, and a plastic water gun. "Holy water," he explains. "As for the stake, if you do manage to get a vamp, remove the stake before it turns to dust or the stake will be dusted, too. Keep at least one always close at hand."

Theo takes the items, puts a stake into a jacket pocket, and then puts the other items into his bag. "I should probably give one of these to my dad then."

Sigh.

"Oh, right, him." Back to the magic room, then two more stakes, another bottle, and another water gun.

Theo waits patiently and then takes them gratefully. "Thanks," he says. "... How many of those do you have?" He shakes his head, then says, "Anyway, we should probably get going."

"I have another eight stakes made, three gallons of holy water, and another five water guns. Oh, also—" He comes back to the room once again and returns with a bunch of jewelry. "Crucifixes. Necklaces, rings, earrings, bracelets, just the crosses, take your pick, I have basically an infinity of these."

"Earrings? I mean, I'm sure I'd look great with a crucifix earring, but I'm not sure my dad needs one." He rolls his eyes. "Maybe a necklace for him? I'm not sure what we'd use the crosses on, except maybe putting them near the front door?"

"If you so much as show one to a vampire, it flinches in fear and stuff. Well, not the toughest, baddest ones, but the average vampire will go all hisssss which might give you time to spray it with holy water, stake it, or run for it. If the crucifix touches their skin, it burns."

"Okay, so is that a 'yes, put one by your front door'? I mean, I guessed it would inconvenience them but I didn't expect it to actually kill them, otherwise presumably you'd put them everywhere in this town?"

"You don't need to put them by your front door, vampires can't get inside unless invited, Willow mentioned that. As for the crosses, I'd love to do that, except I'd love to stay alive more and going out at night covering the town with hidden crosses is basically inviting bitey nasties to an easy meal, magic or no magic."

"Yeah, I know they can't get inside, but I meant as an extra deterrent or for if you open the door and they're right there – can they literally not cross the threshold, or do they just have to have a part of themselves outside the house? – and yeah, I think that's probably sensible."

"Literally not cross the threshold, not even a finger. They can still set your house on fire, though, so yeah, the crosses on the front door aren't a completely useless idea."

"Okay, so again, I'm curious how that interacts if they knock down a wall or something. Is there some sort of impenetrable barrier because that bit's still sorta part of the house, or does that whole room become 'not a private residence', or what. ... I'm guessing you haven't tested it."

"I have not tested it," he says, "nor have I heard of vampires who have—doing that would require a grudge or something and the kind of person a vampire would have a grudge against would not be too inconvenienced by that. Come on, grab a crucifix or three and let's go."

"Right, okay," he says, then takes three crucifixes.

He waits for Sadde to put them down or back in the other room – whatever – and then they can go?

Yup! They can go. "Most vampires aren't trying to cause wanton destruction," he explains. "They just happen to eat people and be evil and want to have their twisted version of fun."

"Which, while terrible, I guess isn't actually targeting specific people or conducting long sieges," he agrees.

Ugh. So he was just super lucky to be targeted by Hans. How nice. He knew that, but still.

"So... any ideas for what to say to my dad? 'Guess what, vampires are a thing, they're allergic to religion and they're all psychopaths that want to eat you, please carry this cross around, thanks'? That covers most of it, right?"

"Plus a small demonstration of magic if he needs some convincing."

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea."


Theo's not really looking forward to telling his dad.

Looking forward to it or not, they have arrived without further incident.

They have!

... And Theo is still not looking forward to it, so he might be trying to look for a way to delay having to reveal vampires and demons to his dad. Ooh! A shrub! How very interesting.

He looks a bit guilty.

Okay, fine. He'll go to the door and go in to find his dad.

Eventually.

Okay, fine. This time he finally goes to the door and opens it, then starts looking around for his dad.

Sadde follows after him.