...okay. They are going to do that. Nice chairs.

"Right. So." Derek claps his hands together.

"The Chelish government has contracted with me to teach you medicine, biology, anatomy and torture, which I'm collectively calling 'fleshlore'. I'm going to be teaching all of your for a term of four months, from Desnus to Arodus, though it might be longer or shorter. We'll see. Anyway, I'm going to be with you all for a while, so we should all introduce ourselves.

Hello, I'm Derek. My surname...uh...well the title for people who have my abilities is Bloodsinger. So maybe you can call me Derek Bloodsinger. The Bloodsinger Derek? Either one. But yeah, Just Derek is also fine. I'm 25 years old. I was born in...well I was born in a different plane, so you wouldn't know the place anyway. But our years are the same length! Our calendars are also really similar...

Hmm...I used to work as a prostitute and a pornographer. I have innate abilities which allow me to peer into the structure of flesh and modify it. Which is why I'm here teaching you all. Though I'm not licensed by any of the authorities that regulate medicine or biology where I'm from — I'm entirely self taught. This is my first time teaching, so I hope you will bear with me in case I'm not the best teacher.

Let's go around and say our name, age, hometown, and something interesting about ourselves. Hmm...let's go clockwise."

Fuck. Why is this happening. What does this have to do with anything. Okay.

"My name is Monica Rabassa, second-year student from the Ostenso Academy. I was born here in Ostenso too...I like illusion spells."

Is that sufficiently interesting? But she also does not want to be too interesting.

"Illusion...I should learn more about your magic. Since arcane magic is learnable. Right, you're a wizard student. Initially, they were planning on only having me teach seminary novices, but then they said that they were interested in having me teach wizard students too. Thank you, Monica. Is it fine if I call you Monica? Or do people here like, use surnames instead?

He refrains from commenting on the omission of age.

"Monica is fine, Derek."

It feels so awkward to just say his name like that, but he said it was fine, so...

Derek seems to be fine with it!

He gestures for the next person.

"Didac Colomer, first-year wizard student from Ostenso Academy. I am nineteen years old," he says, looking at Monica. He smiles. Imagine fucking up on your first day.

"I was born in Peramo. I also like illusion spells."

...she is not going to look torn up about it because she is an adult who can control herself.

"Chosen Asmodia Cardona. Pleased to meet you. Twenty-seven years old. Born in Left Hill. I was born on Loyalty Day."

"What's Loyalty Day?"

"Loyalty Day is the commemoration of the ending of the Chelish Civil War and the ascension of House Thrune. It's also called Signing Day."

"Ah, too bad it has already passed. Thank you."

Next person, please.

"Emili Planell, first-year wizard student from Ostenso Academy. Nineteen years old. Born in Ostenso." Okay, it seems like the Done Thing is say which school you like the best? He will follow.

"I like conjuration spells."

"Chosen Zefir Oriol. Twenty years old. Born in Laekastel. What sort of interesting thing would you want to know about me?"

"I think it's like...the sort of thing you feel is interesting about you is also informative of who you are as a person, in addition to the literal thing that you say. So please say whatever you feel is interesting about you."

Oh, it's that kind of situation. What to say...

"Understood, Derek. For myself...I disprefer the use of whips in torture and I prefer other implements."

"Why so?"

Uh oh, was that an incorrect answer?

"I feel like you have less control with a whip."

"I see. Yeah, it is harder to control, isn't it? Though personally, I'm rather inexperienced with whips, so maybe I just need more practice."

"Chosen Sonia Llovera. I am twenty three years old and was born in Torvo. My parents raised cows and one of them came out with two heads. I hope to learn more about why that happens, here."

...that wasn't really about her but she feels like Derek would like that answer.

"Oh, polycephaly! Was it viable? That is to say, did it live a long time?"

"No, it died soon after it was born."

It seems like she thought correctly.

"Alfons Carbonell, wizard student, twenty, born in Palovera. I really like transmutation spells and I hope these classes make me better at them."

He's saying it like he chose to be here, even though they were selected. But what he's saying is true, regardless.

"Okay, well, I don't know about that. Your magic seems very mathy and I know very little about it. Please do not get your hopes up on that matter specifically. Sorry."

That was not the correct answer, apparently.

...why is he apologizing????? What is he supposed to say?????