"Don't look inside me without my permission," says Sukuna. "I hate it when people do that."
"Alright, now try again, trying to convince me."
Sukuna sighs and withdraws his claws before stepping away, folding his arms behind his back once more as he walks back to his throne. "Fine. I'll promise I won't kill or injure anyone during that minute."
"Through action or inaction," says Itadori, breathing more raggedly now that his wound is left to bleed.
"I beg your pardon?"
"If anyone within your awareness, field or view, whatever, is being hurt and you could save them, you save them. If you are in the middle of a fight and stopping the fight would make people be hurt, you keep fighting. You prioritise humans over curses' wellbeing, you try to stop fights, you do not harm or kill anyone or let them be harmed or killed by failing to help."
"I am the most powerful being in the world," he sighs. "If I wanted to, I could stop most horrible things happening in this country. I could get anywhere fast and stop it. That condition is worse than useless to me."
"Stop acting stupid. You know I do not mean you have to stop every case of domestic abuse in Tokyo during that minute. Just do your best, according to what you think I mean, and we are good."
"Fine. I accept your revised conditions."
"Awesome! Can we fuck no-"
But he is interrupted by Sukuna slicing his head in two.
And Itadori sits up.
"... Apparently not, no. Hello, Tokan. Welcome back."
Ieiri blinks and turns around to look at the no-longer-a-corpse.
"Thank you, Sensei! Good to be back!" says Itadori, grinning.
"I'm kind of disappointed, I had so many tests I wanted to run on you," sighs Ieiri.
("H-h-he's alive!!!!!" repeats Ijichi over and over in shock.)
"Oh, I'm naked," he notices, making no move to conceal anything.
"But isn't this result ultimately more interesting? And if he dies again you'll get another chance at his corpse!" Pause. "Ijichi, stop stating the obvious and go find him something to wear."
"He'll likely have eaten more fingers if you get another chance to look. There will be more to see! But I want that to be far, far in the future. Accordingly, please don’t revise any of your reports, he needs to stay dead for a while.”
"Stay dead?" he asks.
"You mean to hide him?"
“Yeah, I do. At least until he can’t be so easily assassinated by a special grade. Because that’s what happened, if it wasn’t clear, Tokan-kun.”
"I guess Sukuna did kill me," he says, lowering his hand to his crotch and pointing two fingers out, "but seems weird to call it assassination."
Here's Ijichi with clothing.
“…. No. I mean, he did ultimately kill you, but. That ‘assignment’ was a trap. The jujutsu equivalent of telling you to go play in traffic. On the highway. Especially since you’re a vessel, and anything that might become a special grade probably will when you walk in.” Gojo tilts his head. “What are you doing with your hand?”
He stops doing it to accept the clothing but frowns. "Well, he probably has two dicks doesn't he? But I don't know why I... went for that."
"Hm." Gojo settles back in to his seat, frowning. "Did you... talk to him? Make any sort of deal for him to fix your heart?"
"When? Didn't have much time to chat between the special grade and getting killed."