"I um. Just. I dunno."

"It can wait, I haven't even notebooked it out fully."

"No! I wanna hear it! It's just. I. It. I'm. ...I wish I had notebook superpowers like yours so I could figure out what my problem is."

"It's not a superpower. Have you actually tried it?"

"...well, no. I have no idea where I'd even start. It's totally a superpower, though, I was so jealous when you just made yourself want a thing more just by writing about it, like, I spent two weeks failing to think of a single thing I wanted at all the first time around..."

"You just start by writing down your stream of consciousness, and then you read it and if anything seems weird you write more about that. That's the basic process. So I'd write something like 'I don't think I would have broken up with him' and then I'd write, like, why am I confident of that, what information am I using to draw that conclusion, how does that interact with the situation as it stands now in this timeline... But I have practice so I can mostly guess what I'll get if I write about it, most of the time."

"That sounds so embarrassing though?"

"Well that's why nobody gets to read it! If I had to do it in front of a live studio audience I would go thoroughly insane."

"There's the live studio audience of my own brain, though."

"Well, obviously you don't have to try it if you are somehow too embarrassed to have thoughts where you can see them instead of thoughts that merely invisibly affect your every word and deed without accounting for themselves."

"They've gotten me this far!"

"Maybe I should actually try it, I'd be so smug if it worked, and it'd make me a better boyfriend."

"Your call."

"Well now I guess I gotta do it."

"If that's how you assign yourself responsibilities, I guess!"

"It often is."

Knock knock, here's omakase onigiri.

Oh that's so fucking tasty.

Eeeeee.

"- anyway. If you want to hear it -

- the two reasons I mentioned, earlier, that we weren't dating? I would've had only one of those and you seem to have handled it without much help. So I think I wouldn't have dumped you."

"...okay, but... The bad stuff I did to you, I did to—that you. Wouldn't he—you—wouldn't that—I thought—"

"Oh, I mean, I would've been really - alarmed. Angry even. But not I think to the point of dumping you. I'm - the me now is taking ownership of that too, and that's how I feel about it so that's what I extrapolate I would've then."

"But. I. But I mean. But I.

"That sounds too good to be true. ...I guess you—here—alive—letting me—with you—even though you know everything—it also sounds too good to be true, I wouldn't have believed it either, but—"

"What, do you think you're hallucinating?"

"Honestly I've been giving it serious consideration for the past hour!"