"Even armies need a lot of things other than soldiers," Mhalir acknowledges. "Though - I am not sure how suited I am to doing anything other than leading a war." It's encompassed so much of his life, at least the part of it not confined to his Yeerk pool and the walking range of a Gedd host. 

"Because you've never done anything else?"

"...Little else. I did not want that to be the world - I wish..." 

He wants Seerow to not be dead, and he doesn't even know where to start explaining the context there. 

"There is a lot of work to do in the world that isn't war. And - even if you end up deciding that war is the thing you are best suited for, I think people are more competent generally, when they can see more angles on things."

Mhalir doesn't even disagree. He can see, now, how having too-narrow angles on things was upstream of so many of his mistakes, before. Somehow this isn't helping with being less frustrated, though. 

It would be easier if he knew, he thinks, even if he were unable to affect things for a long time. Not knowing is the awful part. 

"- There is something I am trying to remember," he says. "It was during my trial, I think. I learned something and I was happy about it, I remember thinking at least one good thing had come of my being in Golarion. I think I would be less frustrated about things if I could remember it. I - am fairly sure it had to do with someone who I brought to Nirvana six months before the war started, I - I had done very bad things to him - he was Evil, and I thought if he could be here maybe he would learn how to be Good, and that would be better for the world... I think what I learned had to do with that? I should not look for him, he would find it upsetting and might try to murder me, but I wish I knew." 

"Do you want me to go ask around? I couldn't share anything he didn't want shared but if he's doing something or building something someone might know about it."

"Yes, I would appreciate that. His name is Alloran, if that helps." 

She nods. "I don't like to fly at night but I can go talk to people in the morning." And she settles herself in the nest and extends a wing so as to suggest he could sleep under it, if he wanted.

Mhalir has very confusing feelings about the prospect of sleeping under the wing of someone he just met - and it being probably A Metaphor For Something - but one of the feelings he has is that it sounds nice, and sleeping seems hard. 

He wriggles up under Caroline's wing. 

It is warm and fluffy. Her breathing is very even. 

He closes his eyes and tries to sleep instead of being formlessly sad about the world, since the latter isn't accomplishing anything. 

In the morning everything is covered in a thin layer of dew, and the sky is pink and gold, and birds are singing. Caroline does not join them until it's clear Mhalir is awake but then joins with fervor.

It's nice. Mhalir decides that he can notice it's nice without deciding he's fine with being dead and the overall state of the world and the fact that Iomedae won't answer his prayers and Carissa won't tell him what's happening. 

"I am looking to learn about Alloran and what he has been doing?" Caroline asks.

"- Yes. Please." He had almost forgotten about that. 

She heads off. "I'll try to be back by midday. You can shout, if you get yourself into a situation you need help getting out of."

"All right." 

Mhalir sits in the nest for a bit, watching the sky until the sun is fully up and the sky is bright blue again. He wonders if it ever rains here. 

Eventually he decides to fly down and look for seeds. ...And maybe fly up a bit first, see if he can reach the treetops or higher. He hops to the edge of the nest again, and hesitates only a moment before leaping out and flapping as hard as he can. 

It works! The breeze seems to be helping, and now he's above the treehouse, tiring quickly but definitely gaining altitude. He's in an unimaginably vast mountain valley with tall purple peaks in the distance on two sides, and the sea in another direction. There's fog everywhere, but it's starting to burn off in the morning light.

It's beautiful. 

Mhalir stubbornly keeps flapping, trying to get higher, and eventually has to admit exhaustion and - all right this was maybe not very well thought out as a plan. Maybe he can just glide down? 

He glides down pretty sharply and lands in some tall grass with a thump but no real injuries. 

Well, that could have gone worse. He rests for a bit and then hops in what he thinks is the direction of the stream; he can't see very far due to the tall grass. 

Helpfully, the stream is noisy; he can reach the edge of it pretty quickly. A raccoon is drinking from it.

Mhalir is thirsty after the flight, and hops down to drink as well, then looks at the raccoon. "Hello?" he says after a moment. 

The raccoon startles slightly. "- hi. Uh, hello. I didn't realize we could - talk."

"Oh, are you new here as well?" Mhalir frowns - or tries, he has no idea how this ends up working on a baby bird face. Or how it works that he can interpret the other animals' expressions and body language, come to think of it. "Did you wake up alone?"