time-travelling xichen is king of the babies
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"I knew I needed to stab someone! I admit from that description I'm not sure how much need-to-stab is allocated to Qiren as opposed to his brother, but you know, I've got plenty of stab." 

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"Dearheart, if you were going to stab a Sect Leader for being horrible to his wife, we would already be on the run from the Jin sect." 

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"I'm still not convinced stabbing Sect Leader Jin would be more trouble than it's worth. Like, damn, the only reason he hasn't groped me half a dozen times is because I'm good enough at putting steel between me and him." 

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"Please don't say that to A-Yao until we've broken it to him more gently that his father isn't a good man." 

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"--Oh. Shit, I'm sorry," she says to Meng Shi. 

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"I'm sorry," she whispers back. "I did not know until recently, what he was like."

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"Oh, yeah, he starts out real charming, the creepy only comes out if the schmooze doesn't work. Us female cultivators warn each other, but...you wouldn't have that advantage. His wife would be less pissed off at him all the time if he were worse at sweet-talking non-cultivator girls into bed with him." 

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"I have raised A-Yao always telling him that one day his father would come for us and lift him up as a cultivator. I do not yet... know. How to tell him I have lied."

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"Hey, he's the one who lied, you were just wrong. And it's not like we can't teach him, right, two rogue cultivators and a half-trained ex-servant from the Jiang sect and a time-traveling five year old would still probably be a better teacher than Jin Guangshan even if that were as ridiculous as it sounded!" 

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That’s so surprisingly nice from a woman she literally just met that Meng Shi blushes a little. Bows. “We would both be very grateful, my lady.”

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"Hey, hey, don't bow to me, I'm just a rogue cultivator, it's weird," she says hastily. "Anyway, if he's friends with our time-traveler--future him, anyway--it seems like he manages to learn anyway? Somehow?" 

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"I believe his initial education came from the Nie sect." 

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"I'm curious how that happened but it's not super important or anything. Anyway. I guess I won't stab your, uh...husband...? slash jailor if you think it would just make things harder, although, y'know, ready and willing whenever," she says to Lihua. "I'd ask you to help my husband look after our kid while I went, though, it's not the kind of thing I wanna bring my family into." 

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Grim smile. “It would make things harder. I’m sure they’re already desperate enough to hunt me down for kidnapping the sect heirs, don’t want to add to that.

It’s a nice thought, though. Thank you.”

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"Kidna--they're your children!" 

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She snorts. “The Lan Sect doesn’t think so. They were only allowed to see me on the last day of every month. I would be an evil influence.

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"Wow. I knew Lan Qiren sucked, but I had no idea he was evil. I'm sorry." 

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"He -- I suppose he didn't have to let me see them at all. I don't know if their father told him to. And A-Zhan they at least let me keep for the first month, after I hadn't observably turned A-Huan into any sort of demon.

 

They took A-Huan away hours after he was born."

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"Lihua, evil is still evil even if it's not the most evil it can possibly be." 

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"Mm." 

Lihua hugs her son very tightly. "What do you think, sweetheart? Did he do well raising you?"

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"...He did his best. He...blamed you, I think, for Father deciding to marry you rather than let you die, and then going into seclusion and letting him deal with everything. He lost a teacher and his brother all at once, and then there was us, and he didn't know what to do with children but he did his best. But. His best had--flaws. Important ones. Very very important ones. I do love him. But I--when I hesitated to grab A-Zhan and run with you, I was weighing you against Cloud Recesses, against the Lan sect. Not against Uncle. I had no doubts that you would do a better job than Uncle." 

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Squeeze. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for more of your first childhood, my love. And I am glad that he loved you." Pet pet pet.

 

"Are the important flaws something I should know?" She feels very strongly that any of Qiren's parenting flaws are absolutely something she should know, but that doesn't mean they are things she needs to grill her sort-of-five-year-old about.

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"A-Zhan...also...fell in love with someone who was accused of some things. Uncle didn't take it well." 

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"What does that mean, exactly?"

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"Jin Guangshan framed someone for some things and A-Zhan tried to save their life when a lynch mob showed up. It, uh, the results were sort of complicated but by the time I came back the charges were lifted and they were happily married with no imprisonment or coercion involved at all. That took a long time though and Uncle punished A-Zhan for trying to protect them." 

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