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Sparkles mates on Demon Cam
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Sadde's running.

Not for any particular reason, just because it's faster. He's been meaning to go to one of the capitals for a bit and now, he supposes, is as good a time as any.

And eventually he's not running anymore, because he's close enough to civilisation that someone might spot him. Not that he wouldn't be able to notice them by scent before they saw him, but still. And as he makes his way to the Norway capital at this more leisurely pace, he notices the tiny, shiny key. He walks towards it and picks it up and immediately notices just how magic it is. He can tell by the way the key feels like things, and different things depending on where it is.

He verifies that what the key feels like is consistent in absolute location by waving it around a bit and seeing that the same place always feels the same. "Huh," he murmurs to himself.

He straightens up and thinks. The first obvious thing to try is seeing whether it opens any doors—a universal skeleton key sounds like the kind of thing a magical key could be—but the second obvious thing can be tested right there and then. He pushes the key into thin air with some purpose, as if he wanted to unlock an invisible door, and then turns it, et voilà, the faintest of door-shaped outlines appears before him.

He locks the door, and it disappears. Unlocks it again, and there it is. So he pulls it open and sees—

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- a park!

It has some fire pits, actually a fair number of them, and lots of plants of various kinds that look like they would have been ridiculously hard to grow together in that way but they look really picturesque.

In this park are people of odd ethnic mishmashes - blue eyed black people, redheaded ice-pale people with Indian features, Jewish noses on folks who would otherwise look Asian - and they seem to be demons. Everybody's got bat wings; some of them have horns, many have tails, a few have claws and hooves and fangy teeth.

It seems to be a musical gathering of some kind! Everybody's got sheet music and are picking their way through a weird polyphony. There's two demons on flutes, there's an electric cello and an elaborate drum set and an unidentifiable form of horn and one demon on a violin -
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-who is the hottest person alive.

Sadde takes one step forward and definitely doesn't notice the door closing and vanishing behind himself. He doesn't even breathe, and just keeps staring at that piece of art who should be in a museum or perhaps on his bed.
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The music comes to an awkward stop.

Demons begin conversing in various unfamiliar languages and finally they start addressing Sadde in more recognizable terms - "Sprechen Sie Deutsch?" "¿Hablas Español?" "Parlez-vous Francais?"

It's the one who looks like a non-mixed-up white guy and is also the hottest person alive who tries, "D'you speak English?"
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He recognises the questions even if he can't properly answer all of them. "Je parle français, oui, but English is my first language, hello there," he says in what he hopes of his most seductive tone of voice, not taking his eyes off the hot one for a second. Not even to blink.

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Some of the demons, who apparently don't speak English, disengage from the conversation. There is a brief discussion of who is to take charge of the new guy - "we've got two flutes, Zoray, you take him" "what, no, lookit him eyefucking Cam" "and do you think Cam wants to be eyefucked?" "what's he going to do, put me over my recommended daily allowance?" and then Cam puts his violin down and motions Sadde away from the resumed jam session.

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Sadde notices the rest of the world exists about halfway through that, and looks somewhat sheepish. But only somewhat. He follows the hot one—Cam, that's his name—while grinning. "Sorry about the eye, um, thing," he says.

Speaking of eyes, at this point Cam might notice just how golden Sadde's are.
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"I'll survive. So, welcome to Hell, how'd you die?"

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"...that's a very, very unexpected question. I'm pretty sure I'm not dead." He's not eyefucking Cam, but he's definitely still eyeing him. "Did I accidentally end up in the afterlife? Should I be concerned it's called Hell? Is anyone going to try torturing me for eternity?"

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"The pits of fire are not and have never been intended to contain people. You already speak some languages and you didn't come with your own set of wings, which, around here, generally means that you are a dead ex-human new demon as opposed to an ex nihilo new demon."

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"Ex-human, yes, dead and new demon, not as far as I know. I might need you to explain me all of that."

Sadde has, of course, realised by now just why he thinks Cam is the hottest person alive, so he's trying to play it cool and such, because the prospect of scaring this person away is absolutely terrifying don't even think it oh my god, play it cool, be cool.
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"Uh, when you were alive did you ever summon any form of daeva, even once, even if you didn't give them a task?"

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...oh my god this person is so attractive why is this person this attractive? Did he really need to be this attractive? This is entirely unfair.

He doesn't let that show. "I don't know what a daeva is or how to summon one. And I'm still pretty certain I'm not dead."
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"Okay, what were you doing immediately before you showed up?"
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"Using a magic key to open a magic portal to, well, here."

Look at that face. So kissable. It's such a kissable face. Breeeathe—wait, he doesn't need to actually breathe. It's all in his head. All in his head.
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"Okay. Maybe you are, in fact, not a demon at all."
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"Yes, I am fairly certain the thing I am is a vampire. Look, try to squeeze me," he says, offering Cam a hand.

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Cam attempts to squeeze him.

"...I didn't know vampires were a kind of animate marble sculpture."
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Eeeeeeeee Cam touched him! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

"Roughly accurate. Now, given that I used a magic portal to end up in what appears to be an afterlife, and furthermore you seemed to think I should know what a daeva is or how to summon one, I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume I'm actually from a completely different world, or universe, or however you wanna call that."
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"That would seem to be the conclusion, assuming you are not completely having me on, since I'm pretty sure we don't have vampires. Although Hell isn't primarily an afterlife. Most demons didn't use to be humans, they just appear one day."

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"I'm not completely having you on," he reassures this god amongst (im)mortals. "So, anyway, before I go any further, I think the most immediately relevant fact about my kind of vampire is that we have this magical soulmate thing going on where if I lay eyes on a person I'm mutually romantically compatible with I am instantly and magically in love with them forever. And that happened when I looked at you."

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"I. Appreciate your bringing this to my attention."
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"Yes, I thought you would, given that you're the type of person I would fall in love with and who would fall in love with me."

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"Do you have, like, a name."

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"Sadde, that's S-a-d-d-e, yes pretty weird I know. I presume you're Cam, from the thing over there with the other, uh, demons."

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"Yeah, I'm Cam. Yes, we are all demons here except apparently you. And yours is not the weirdest name one encounters in a society where fully grown adults appear with no language skills or preexisting social connections on a routine basis."

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