"I happened to be nearby and thought I'd see what event Miss Marburry had put together for the evening." Going by his expression, his expectations weren't very high.

"Coffee is an acquired taste."

"Well, I've acquired it and it wasn't to my taste."

"Lord Metcalfe, I don't believe you've met Haru Swan, Duke of Beruna in Narnia who has just arrived in London. Mr. Swan may I introduce to you Lord Richard Metcalfe, son of Duke Metcalfe, whose delightful access to portals I believe I have had cause to mention to you previously."

"Delightful is it? I thought you felt that all powers should be put at the beck and call of the commoners or some such."

"I must have misspoken previously, I'm sure the acquisition of foreign luxuries such as chocolate for submission to your discerning taste is the worthiest possible use for such an ability."

The really infuriating thing is that this will read as an apology to Lord Metcalfe.

"Well, that's good to have corrected then."

"Oh, is your family invested in international trade? I agree that's a worthy use. I'd love to set you up with contacts in Narnia who'd be delighted to export to England, if only I could reach any of them."

"We dabble in it occasionally, though providing for importation to anyone who asks is not our custom."

Their parties are known for having foreign luxuries which are presumably incredibly affordable somewhere but they only import enough for the parties and some token extra people can beg them for. Not pay! Beg! The Duke Metcalfe likes to tell a definitely false story about how he was offered a chest of gold artifacts for one coconut and refused!

Haru is trying not to rely on them having any higher motives at all. "Well, even if you don't like coffee you might really like chocolate."

"You think so?"

"Oh, yes. Coffee's an acquired taste, people just take it to wake up whether they like it or not back in Narnia. Chocolate's a treat, I don't know that I've ever met a Narnian who doesn't like it."

"Do all Narnians like it?"

"The way I've heard Lord Swan talk about it I'd assume few of them have ever had the chance to try it."

"Well, there are different grades, I think most Narnians have had the opportunity to enjoy at least the cheap kinds."

"So, a commoner food then?"

"Is salt a commoner food? There are more and less sophisticated ways to use the ingredient."

"Oh, you're a clever one aren't you."

"On occasion."

"Well, how about you put your cleverness to use and join me and my friends in some late night hunting."

Not exactly the social in with the portal family he was hoping for, though probably he's not spoiled for choice. "Is that an occupation well served by cleverness?"

"Well, we'll have to find out."

Haru going hunting with Metcalfe sounds like a possibly terrible idea but it would definitely be rude to refuse so...

"I can let my carriage know to pick you up from Lord Metcalfe's estate later, Duke Swan."

"Thank you kindly, Lady Oakhill. I confess I'm not much of a hunter, I may be dreadfully ill-acquainted with the strategy of it."