A second ago she was at work in the temple of Erastil in Sothis, which was actually going pretty okay, all things considered. Now she's in a grassy field with a couple fruit trees and a table and chairs and some notebooks and pens.
This is unexpected and requires a ton of power and is therefore sort of inherently terrifying. And she's alone, and defenseless, and she doesn't know where Verita is.
She mills around in steadily increasing amounts of distress until Hagan appears, just as suddenly.
One of the things about being telekinetic, at least to the extent that she is, is that it involves being very aware of all of the matter in her vicinity. She can feel every blade of grass, every leaf on all of the trees, where all of the people are and what all of them are doing and how loud all of them are being. She can't actually figure out what they're saying, when they're too far away for her to properly hear, but she does get volume.
Imrainai's upset.
Yeah. I am trying to not eavesdrop on them. Sometimes people don't like it if you hear things they wouldn't have expected you could hear.
No, I think that is okay. If they don't want you to hear when they see you they'll stop talking. It's just hearing where they wouldn't expect you to that I try to avoid.
- uh, sure.
The one from hell wants to know if you're okay, she sends Korva.
"Uh, just - this is weird. Childishly bemoaning my lack of marital prospects. I guess I don't really expect you to have a lot of context for this."
" - it's not that I can't, it's just that it's not going to happen. Which is fine."
"I'm never going to get married because nobody is ever going to fall in love with me. Nobody is ever going to fall in love with me because I am a cold, dead, affectionless harpy who is never going to love anyone in a way that would make them want to love me back. Also because I have probably somehow made myself unmarriageable by the standards of every society in existence, which would be very inconvenient if I didn't already have this problem anyway. Is that what you wanted to know?"
"What about you. You're, like, thousands of years old, right, have you ever been in love? Ever felt anything that looked like it in very specific lighting?"
"What happened with that? Assuming you're fine with everyone being exactly as nosy back."
I guess so.
Very very long ago, I was transported to a world in the middle of an apocalyptic war, with Alex and my dog and two vampires and a human man I had never met before. It was discovered that we could end the war by trapping the evil god inside a human infant. We did not have any human infants. I decided that we would create one. The other human was upset about it. I was sixteen, and we were all very young, and somehow the difference between us seemed very big, at that time. He was worried about the fact that I had never had sex before. I'd never even wanted to kiss anyone. He was also really sure that Alex was in love with me.
I convinced him to have sex with me. I remember thinking that it was just about the most painful thing that had ever happened to me. But it worked. I had a baby. I sealed the god inside her. Everyone forgot what had happened, as part of the spell. The other human proposed to me right away. When I had confirmed that the spell had worked, I killed the baby and the god, and he never spoke to me again.
For a long time after that - a long time as young humans count time - I felt like all of the pieces of myself weren't connected very well. I didn't do anything but sit in my room. I spent a lot of time wishing that Alex would hold me, or kiss me, or tell me he loved me. But I was worried that everything inside me was rotten and evil and horrible, and that if I kept feeling like that I would make the feelings turn rotten and evil and horrible. So I decided that I would lock the feelings in a little imaginary box, and I would put a little imaginary lock on it, and I would leave all of my feelings about Alex inside the box, and not open it or think about it or touch it at all, and that way it wouldn't get any horrible on it.
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