Sean's thoughts make an interesting background to her own, and even though she tunes them out half the time as she sobs, not letting them distract her from her own thoughts running in circles and pain and misery and loss and horror, eventually she does listen, in bits and pieces, switches from sobbing to sniffling, and thinks.
The asshole wanted to make it like it never happened, and while he was ever right that he couldn't ever make it so it never happened, that all of this would be gone forever, honestly, she wishes that too. She wants to go back her simple happy desires and wants and be happy bouncy joyful about meeting a cute boy and dancing with him and dating him and going out with him and having a lovely first relationship and she wants the opportunity for that. Again. She wants to go back to how it was with him, all happy and gleeful and headoverheels carefree and really it can never be like that he'll always be him even if he'd never done that to her, she'd still be horrified by who he really was. She's pretty sure. But she wants to do that with him, she wants things to go back to what they were like before, she wants none of this to be real, and he could make her forget, make her forget it, but then they'd just be back where they started with everything being made of lies. She wants to have the opportunity to have this with someone else, anyone else, to have her first time with a person who doesn't secretly rape her and wipe her memory, she wants the first time she remembers to be good, even if really, it was horrible and nothing could ever change that. But he can change her. And what really matters is what she remembers. She wishes she could forget him forever, but that would require her to be his (ugh) it seems like, to edit her memories so carefully. And Carol would notice. As would the several other dozen people she'd talked to about him the past week.
She needs to talk to him about this, she needs to figure out what the heck their options are at this point. She doesn't fully know what she wants yet, what she can have from what's available, if there's anything available at all, but she has to find out.
Jenna picks up her head, looking at Sean, giving him the hardest and frostiest look she can through her tears. "Alright," she tells him. "We need to figure out what we're doing next. Asshole. Let's figure out our options." She can feel him thinking about her and she wants it to stop but she wants to make sure he doesn't read her and she does her best to tune him out again. "On one end there's you wiping all my memories and and breaking up with me and and letting me go back to my perfectly normal life with only a slight hiccup and regret and loss on my end, leaving you to rot like you deserve." Maybe he would ever find someone who would be ok that he'd done all of this, maybe Jenna would have been ok with this if it hadn't been done to her, if he'd told her and broke down in apology and she'd believed him, she'd have been initially horrified but maybe helped. But that's a road that might be closed to her.
Jenna continues, "On the other end there's me becoming yours, whatever that means, and keeping all my memories or taking them all away, so I'm protected against whatever other shit is out there but vulnerable to whatever you want to do to me whenever you want to do it and I don't care how much fucking regret you feel right now I don't want you changing your mind in a fit of despair and, and..." she sobs again. She takes a breath. "I don't want you reading my mind anymore unless I let you, asshole, you don't deserve it. You really don't. Not from me."
Jenna shudders, and sobs, but catches herself. "But what about in the middle somewhere, you asshole. I really wish you hadn't told me any of this, but I'm sure you knew that already. I'm not asking you to do this, not that I could particularly stop you, but what could you take away. What could you do to get us right back to where we were, having a perfectly normal relationship, no matter how much it fucking hurts you. Or what about making me forget this conversation ever happens and we go to the world where I get to learn about magic and never hear about how you raped me and took away my choices like a thief, you asshole. And then maybe you claim me and maybe you hurt forever and ever but I'm never any the wiser. I don't know if I want any of that, asshole. But I want to know what's possible. What you can stomach with your hatred of lies. What we can take back, as you keep seeming to want to do."