"I think I won't answer this one."

"I need bleach."

"You're so theatrical."

Next.

Hey, sorry to email you out of the blue like that, but I was reading this post of yours about the statistics of esper compatibility and it doesn't take exactly the same tack as my research does but it's pretty similar so you might be interested? Here's the paper on arXiv, it's currently undergoing peer review and if it passes it'll be published here.

This email gets a star and the paper opened in a tab for later but he can't read it right now. Next!

Someone saying Cricket is gorgeous. Someone nitpicking one of his blog posts. Another thirsty fangirl, this one linking Haru/Jaeha RPF they wrote on AO3. Someone who's happy Haru stole Jaeha from Wo Do-in because they think Wo Do-in is a jerk. Someone who wants to know if Haru and Jaeha and Sparkler have ever had a threesome. Someone who thinks Haru's research is bad and sloppy and who links their own blog, which is itself bad and sloppy and kind of crackpot-y. Someone thanking Haru for all the effort he puts into his posts. Someone thanking Haru for how nice he always is to people he runs into, themself included. Someone who's really mad that Jaeha stole Haru from them because they want to have Haru for themself. Someone who claims they're interviewing espers with dual-citizenships for unclear statistical purposes.

Haru is potentially willing to be interviewed for unclear statistical purposes if they could become clearer statistical purposes. It is always nice to hear that his affect when he's in dungeons is landing well. ...the RPF can go in a tab in case Jaeha gets a kick out of it. Cricket dictates a reply to the compliment in which he says that presumably everyone with eyes knows he's gorgeous but few people take the time out of their day to remark on this obvious fact.

Jaeha arrives home a little bit after that, and he looks...

...well, he isn't trying to mask at all.

Oh no his poor Jaeha. Haru rolls over, prompting Cricket to hop off him and race away into elsewhere in the house, and he gets up and hugs him.

He hugs back, automatically, and, ah. Yeah. This, this makes it all worth it. His Haru.

"Tadaima," he says, softly, with a smile that doesn't at all reach his eyes.

"Okaeri. - it is very admirable that you're willing to do dungeons when they get you like this but it's a touch confusing."

"...the acute symptoms melt into more manageable ones eventually even without guiding, and I committed to not making any decisions like that until they're gone."

"...makes sense." They should stop wearing shirts, Haru has made an executive decision.

Yeah, he's amenable. That'll make the acute symptoms go away much faster. "When this gets bad enough I get suicidal. After one too many close calls, I..."

"...you?"

Shrug. "I no longer pay attention to what I'm feeling or thinking. Not until I'm—better. I just keep doing whatever I was doing, trusting that that decision was probably good enough. It's not like any other decision feels any better, anyway."

Pet pet. "Well, that's probably at least - convenient for the project, I guess."

"'The project'?"

"I've been referring to 'Project Cut It Out Forever'?"

"Ah. Right."

"I can do the thing where I fuck you through the blah till it goes away but I have to admit it's less appealing than when you're discernibly horny about it, d'you have a preference either which way?"

"I'd prefer being 'fucked through the blah', yes. I can... look hornier?" He never felt motivated to try, with his prior partners, but he knows he can do it.

"Nah, that'd weird me out." Kiss. "Come to bed."

To bed! 

"I understand that. And I—am not saying this to insist, but just to add a model of—it's sometimes useful, to me, to think of the person I'm presenting as more real than the person I'm feeling like, since... I'm choosing to be him. And I'm not choosing to be—this."

"Hm. I think that makes a lot of sense on the level of longer term policies and preferences and such and less on the level of moment to moment moods. Anyway. On your knees."