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Feb 03, 2023 9:03 AM
Cegorach the trickster god tries a longshot plan involving orks and a human soul, because it’s not like he can make things any worse.
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Somebody was with her when she was born, at any rate. "I want yer pants." Stars that sounded dirty. 

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He shrugs and takes them off, chucking them at Jennifra. “Thas not so bad a loss, watch’er name anyway? Mine is Groknath.” A simple sort of friendly smile coming from him even through shattered front teeth. Groknath may not be the smartest or strongest ork in the horde but he was the happiest and friendliest one you were likely to meet.

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She puts the pants on to buy herself a couple seconds to think, then says, "I'm Bigjaw." 

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“Ye do have a big jaw, me firs’ name was Smiler before I figured out a betta wun.” He looks Jennifra up and down and a thought visibly takes a few seconds to complete on his face. “If yer a fresh spawn...then ya probably haven’t met da boss then? Ya should meet da boss, specially since yous good inna scrap.”

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Oh good, name changes are a thing, she isn't stuck with Bigjaw forever if she comes up with something less default.

"I should definitely meet da boss." Because boy does she have a fight to propose.

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“I’ll take ya to da boss then.” And Groknath leads Jennifra to the center of the camp where the big building and the crowd was and some really big orks in much nicer clothes than the regular rabble. “Ey boss! New fresh spawn jus’ arrived an’ he can fight real good he can, knocked me right onto da floor twice.” He says to one of the largest orks there with a fancy tricorner hat with a plume of red hair coming out the top and actual plates of body armor on his ripped chest, presumably the boss of this tribe.

 

The boss roars with laughter “Thas not very hard though innit! But I saw this fresh spawn fight earlier outside the camp too, not bad for summing without practice.” The boss was still using ork dialect but his pronunciation was obviously better than everyone Jennifra had met until now. “Gonna need strong Boyz for this next raid we will. What's yer name?.” He says to Jennifra.

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The gender thing is odd, but given that orks don't seem to have biological sexes she can see how they'd end up not distinguishing genders either. "My name's Bigjaw. What's the next raid?" She sort of expects it will be something awful, but she needs to build political capital so that when she says "let's go find some gods and kill them" it seems like a reasonable idea.

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The boss grins a wicked toothy grin. "So I waz thinkin, right? why raid planets for loot and slaves and 'ave to sort through all the bitz to find the good stuff, when we can raid dem tall spiky slaver ones who already did all the work! all they do iz go steal from umies so why not nick their stuff since they've helpfully collected it for uz."

Most of the other orks look confused, a few of the bigger ones seem to understand and nod, high-risk high reward stealing from other essentially pirate forces. The dumber smaller ones see the big ones nodding and nod along just not wanting to feel left out.

Groknath looks confused. "If dey iz being helpful for us why iz we stealin' it? won't dey jus' give it to us?"
The boss ork smacks Groknath around the back of the head. "They ain't really being helpful was a figure of speech!"

Blacknail has faithfully followed Jennifra to the meeting but is being very careful to avoid any orks attention, poor sod looks scared out of his mind being in front of the boss.

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She gets to fight some slavers! And then she gets to stop the other orks from taking slaves themselves, that'll probably be the tricky part. "Hey, that's a real good plan!"

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“This is a Mork kind of Boy if I ever saw wun.” The boss ork laughs cheerfully at Jennifra agreeing to his plan and claps Grocknath on the shoulder pushing him towards her. “Grocknath get our scrappy Bigjaw a shoota and a choppa and introduce dem to the rest of the Boyz in training.”

So Groknath leads her away to some supply huts staffed by scrawnier orks whos jobs it was to keep the gretchin from stealing anything.

First Grocknath gets Jennifra a crude metal Axe with a very tall blade so that it can be used as a machete almost. “Dis is a choppa, every ork shud ‘ave a choppa. Make or trade for a betta wun when ye can.”

Groknath then hands her a beaten up gun-shaped piece of bashed together metal scrap from the pile, but it is slightly more gun shaped than the others. At least the barrel is straight on this one. “I made dis wun, my shootas explode less than all the rest!” He grins cheerfully as he hands it to you. What a nice lad.

Blacknail looks in awe at the firearm Jennifra now owns, the diminutive greenskin is practically vibrating in excitement at the sight of a gun.

And the till now mostly silent ork instincts feel very happy at Jennifra holding an axe and a gun.

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"Thank you!" What was that Cegorach had said about orks being powered by belief? "The Ork psychic field will let you fight anything." If Groknath says this is a gun, and Blacknail says it's a gun, and she says it's a gun, then by the stars it's a gun, and a good one too. She looks around for something to shoot.

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There is trash all around if she wants to shoot at it, some squigs rifling through dirt and trash also make acceptable targets. Ork instinct brain is sort of tempted to shoot at a gretchin tending a fire also. Couple of boulders around if she wants to test the spread of the gun.

 

Groknath is very happy someone thanked him for his work, nobody has ever done that before. He gets paid for services sometimes if its a nicer gun but not ever thanked. “I iz a mekboy I build stuff! I can build ya tings friend! if ya need more stuff come see me on de side of de camp with de rock dat look like a fist.” Groknath has decided he and Bigjaw are friends, only friends would be that nice to each other.

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"Sure thing, friend!" She's never beaten and robbed a nicer guy. If making allies stays this easy she'll be charging the gates of Death in no time.

She's not shooting a gretchin, brain, get it together before the combat starts and she has to double-check every impulse for being friendly fire. She shoots a boulder, expecting as sincerely as possible that her aim is excellent and that the boulder will get super wrecked.

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Yeah no. Most of the shots do not hit where she aimed, but at least they mostly hit the boulder. The recoil is insane and ork arms are stupidly strong so that is saying something. The rate of fire is actually pretty excellent for a non automatic one handed gun made of scrap. And the shots do carve out pretty decent chunks of stone from the boulder, imagine what they would do to exposed flesh.

 

Sort of suits the orks general strategy, just fire enough bullets and one of them is sure to hit.

 

Blacknail is jumping up and down with excitement at the gunfire. You visibly can see him wanting to shoot the gun as the thing he wants most in life. it’s not just body language it might even be psychic shenanigans he is giving off the desire to hold and fire the shoota so badly.

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She'll get used to the recoil eventually. Firing into a mass will clearly be better than trying to snipe. When there are a couple of shots left in the shoota, she turns to Blacknail and holds it out. "Wanna try? Be careful, though, the recoil might knock ya on her arse."

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Blacknail the gretchins life is now complete and he can die happy, he loves guns and never expected to be able to fire one. He was just tagging along with Jennifra for convenience but this bought his loyalty. Blacknail takes the shoota like it is a holy relic, braces it like a rifle and fires. Slow measured shots with him re-aiming between them because the recoil almost knocks him off his feet.

He is actually pretty accurate! For using an ork gun he gets a much tighter spread than Jennifra did even if it takes him a lot longer to line up his shots. With a better gun, he might make a good sharpshooter, well better than an ork anyway.

"BEST DAY EVER! AHAHAHAHAHAH." Cackling with glee.

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"Hey, yer a good shot when ya take yer time about it! Have you ever been on a raid?"

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"Me? nonononono, Gretchin who go as shoota fodder not come back. All you get is a pointy stick! If you are lucky!" Blacknail looks pretty nervous at the mention of being made to go on raids.

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"Hey, if you don' wanna raid, don't raid. If ya did, I'd want ya to be well back from the main fight, shooting from somewhere high up where ya can git a good shot without worrying about getting hit."

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"Shooting? I'd get to shoot?" Well, now Blacknail seems interested, though he doesn't know about being left alone without an ork to protect him. That seems scary still. "Yous iz da best boss ever." Handing back the shoota to Jennifra, if it was anyone else he'd have tried to scamper off with it.

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"Yah, no point in you goin' unless you gets ta shoot. The tricky bit is finding a place ta shoot from." She takes the shoota back, trying not to show that she was kind of worried he'd scamper off with it. Then she thinks about tactics. She's never raided a spaceship before--never been on one, in fact; the space around her star system was too hostile for any sort of travel. But she expects a maze of confined spaces, making it difficult to find a place to snipe from. And a whole squad of sharpshooters would be a better bet than a lone one. "Do you think other gretchins would make good shots too? Maybe you could all practice, and then next time we raid a planet there could be a whole lotta you. Wouldn't that give da umies or whoever a surprise."

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“I’d be careful trustin’ otha Gretchin with shootas, but with a boss this great I iz sure you could find lots to work for yas!” Waving his arms wide when he indicates lots. “Also if the sticky outy bit was longer I think it wud shoot more straight.” Blacknail, smarter than his childish demenour and low cunning would suggest. At least when it comes to guns.

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"Well, if ya find any others ya think kin be trusted and kind learn ta shoot, lemme know about 'em, alright?" She takes a few steps away and starts practicing with the Choppa, swinging it experimentally while being careful not to dismember herself or Blacknail.

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Choppa wielding comes easy to Jennifra. It really isn’t a hard weapon to understand with the ork instincts helping her along. It isnt built for fancy swordplay more just hacking and slashing with more strength and weight than the other guy.

 

Groknath is waiting patiently for her to be done. “Supposta introduce ya to the otha boyz in ya squad and the Nob in charge of it also...” 

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She slings the choppa over her shoulder and says, "Yes, thanks, let's do that."

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